If I can't Have You
by penguinrockstars
Summary: Sequel to Cross My Heart And Hope To Die. Niki is 21 years old and single. Nate and her still haven't gotten back together. Her daughter CassieBella is a huge Connect Three fan. Can one concert change Nate and Niki and bring them together again?
1. Chapter 1

If I can't have you chapter one

CassieBella stood in her room, listening to her music. Her blonde hair was bouncing around as she was dancing around her room. Her hair was straight and went to her shoulder blades. She of course didn't know all the words, but she still danced.

CasieBella was my beautiful baby daughter. She was four years old. She looked a lot like Nate. She had Nate's ears, hands, body structure, she even had his mouth. She didn't have his curly hair though. She had my straight blonde hair.

I was now 22 years old. Living by myself and raising CassieBella. Gavin my very best friend from Not So Secret was now a huge rockstar. He helped support us by helping pay some of the bills, and even sometimes taking care of CassieBella when he was on vacation from touring.

Gavin was my very best friend. And he was only that. He got married when I was 19 and CassieBella was 2. He asked her if she wanted to be the flower girl. And she said yes, as best as a 2 year old can. She looked so pretty, and everyone loved her. Gavin's parents thought that she was 'just the cutest thing'. Me and Gavin were like brother and sister. And Gavin's parents pretty much adopted me and CassieBella, as their daughter and granddaughter. CassieBella called Gavin's parents grandpa and grandma. So everything worked out pretty fine.

But there were a couple things that did not work out very well. One of things was that CassieBella kept asking about her father. She would look up at me and I would almost burst into tears from seeing Nate in her. She would look up at me and ask in her sweet, innocent voice, 'Mommy, where's Daddy?'. It killed me every single time, because I would change the subject. She was fine with that, for now. But she also happened to be a fan of Connect Three. She always wanted to go to a Connect Three concert. She always wanted to go backstage and meet everyone. Especially Nate.

The other thing was seeing Nate on TV. Seeing them playing live shows. I loved Nate with all of my heart. I loved him and always would love him. I tried dating a few people, but they could never compare to Nate. I didn't think that I would ever move on. Gavin told me to either move on or go and find Nate and be with him. I couldn't do either. I didn't want to do either.

"Niki! CassieBella!" I heard Gavin walk into the house. I saw CassieBella run past me and jump into Gavin's arms.

"Uncle Gavin!" I smiled and giggled a little. CassieBella smiled widely and hugged Gavin. He set her down and she jumped on the couch started swinging her legs back and forth.

"So Gav, what're you doing here?" Gavin smiled widely and CassieBella stared up at him.

"Well, I have a little surprise for you and CassieBella." CassieBella smiled widely and started getting more and more excited by the minute.

"I got backstage passes and third row seats to…CONNECT THREE!!!" I felt my mouth drop open. My heart started racing, and I felt myself pale. CassieBella however was jumping up and down and started screaming 'yay' over and over again. I looked at Gavin and I told CassieBella that I had to talk to Gavin and told her to either stay here or go to her room. She nodded and rushed off to her room. I smiled at her and then stared at Gavin.

"Gavin! You know that I don't want to go and see him!" I really did want to see Nate. I just didn't want to admit it.

"Niki, I know that you do. I know that it's killing you, that you can't see him." I cursed mentally. Gavin saw through my lie.

"Gavin, what about CassieBella. She doesn't know that Nate is her father." Gavin nodded and then answered.

"I know that Niki. But don't you think that he has a right to see his daughter? Or at least meet her?" I nodded and Gavin smiled and crossed his arms over his chest.

"But Gavin, what if he doesn't want her? What if he doesn't care? What if he is married to someone else? What if he has other kids?" Gavin rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Niki. He is not remarried. If he was, there would be divorce papers that you would have to pay. He doesn't have other kids. If he did, they would be in the news. He will care because he was excited to have kids." I nodded, and sighed. I didn't want to do this. But if I wanted to move on with my life, I had to do this. Gavin smiled and called out CassieBella. She came running out and jumped on the couch, listening attentively.

"Me, you and your mom are all going to go to the Connect Three concert!" CassieBella started screaming again and started jumping up and down again. I turned to look at Gavin and he gave me a look. He smiled and I forced a smile for CassieBella.

__________The Next Day____________

I dressed CassieBella in some jeans and a sweater. I pulled her hair into a ponytail, and told her to go and wait for Uncle Gavin, while I got dressed. She nodded and ran out of my room and sat down on the couch. I sighed and went to my closet.

I pulled out a long black tee-shirt. It went down to mid thigh and was semi-tight all the way down. I pulled on some dark jeans, and slipped on some sneakers. I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth quickly. I curled my hair in tight ringlets, and I pulled it into a loose side ponytail, and clipped up some loose hairs. I put on some perfume and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I noticed that not a lot had really changed. I looked pretty much the same, except that I was a little taller, and looked more grown up. I sighed and walked out of my bathroom, and into the living room. I saw Gavin sitting on the couch talking to CassieBella.

"Hey Niki. You look pretty." I smiled and nodded. Gavin got off the couch and pulled CassieBella off. He took her outside and put her in the car seat in my truck. He got in the passenger side, and I got in and gripped the steering wheel.

"Mommy, are we going to go?" I nodded and forced a smile.

"Of course Hunny." She giggled and I pulled out of the driveway. I drove down the street to the venue. I was still gripping the steering wheel. I was taking deep breaths, trying to calm myself down.

We got to the venue, parked, and I saw a lot of young girls and teens, I saw parents with their young children. I saw mothers and fathers, and almost broke down knowing that at the moment, I couldn't give CassieBella the family that other children had. I couldn't because I didn't have Nate. I was drawn out of my thoughts by Gavin pulling on my sleeve telling me to get out of the vehicle. I sighed and followed him. I followed him into the venue, but got distracted by seeing two people standing outside of the building. I looked over and saw that it was Becky and Shane. They were laughing and Shane's arms were wrapped around Becky's waist. I frowned and wanted to cry again. I remembered when me and Nate were like that. I turned away and followed Gavin and CassieBella.

Gavin walked over to the merch table and grabbed a tee-shirt. He held it up to CassieBella, smiled and then handed the guy some money. CassieBella smiled and pulled the shirt on. Gavin smiled and grabbed her hand and pulled her along, towards the back of the building. I followed and noticed that we were going backstage. The security guard stopped us and we showed him our backstage passes. We followed him and Gavin started smiling bigger. He knocked on a door, and I stood behind Gavin. He walked in and I followed slowly.

"Hey guys. You might not remember me, but I am Gavin." Everybody's eyes widened and they smiled widely. Nate came up and hugged Gavin, and I tired to shrink behind him. Nate looked at CassieBella and then smiled. He bent down to her level and smiled.

"Hi, sweetie. What's your name?" She smiled widely, and I hope that she didn't introduce me.

"I'm CassieBella. And this is my mommy." I froze and she went behind Gavin and pulled on my hand. I stood in front of everybody and paled. Nate looked up at me and he froze as well. I looked at everybody's expressions. And they were the same.

"Niki." I froze and looked around nervously.

"Hi, Nate." He stood up and just stared at me. I stared at him and then looked at Gavin.

"Niki. Why didn't you call me?" I glared at Nate and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Why didn't you try and call me?" Nate looked at me, but didn't answer. I looked at him, shook my head and excused myself. I walked out, sat down against the wall and cried.


	2. Chapter 2: Still in love with you

Hey guys! So here is the second chapter and in this chapter, two people get into a fight. Anyway so I am trying to keep writing this like I wrote the others. I hope that this story meets up to your guys's standards. Anyway, so please review and let me know what you think. I want to thank my very first reviewer for this story…**muzzy power!!!** Thanks a bunch for the reviews and I hope that you like this chapter.

If I Can't Have You Chapter 2: Still In Love With You

I sat against the wall and cried my eyes put. I didn't care who saw me, I just cried. I let out all of my frustration, and emotions. I just cried. I heard someone walk closer, but I didn't know who it was.

"Niki? Are you okay?" I looked up to see Jason standing above me. I wrapped my arms around my knees and pulled them to my chest. I rest my head on my knees and looked away from him.

"Why aren't you leaving Jason? I just left you guys. I didn't say goodbye. I just left. I betrayed all of you." Jason sat beside me and shook his head.

"Niki, you were scared and pregnant. You found out that you got pregnant and then you find out that your husbands parents don't want anything to do with you if you have a child. If I were you, I would've done the same thing." I looked over at him and saw that he was telling the truth.

"I couldn't get rid of my baby. I would never get rid of my baby." Jason nodded and then ran his fingers through his hair.

"I tried convincing everyone else that you were only trying to protect your baby. That you weren't trying to hurt anyone. But they wouldn't listen. And Melissa and Becky, I thought that they would've had the most compassion for you, but they had the very least." I broke out into a new bunch of tears. Jason frowned and gave me a side hug.

"I missed you. Nate missed you. He still loves you. He took his wedding ring and put a chain through it. It's his necklace, and he never takes it off." Jason looked down at my hand and I held it up to show that I still had my ring on.

"I missed Nate so much Jase. I missed all of you. I knew that everyone was going to be mad. But I thought that they would've gotten over it." Jason shook his head and then smiled lightly.

"Shane, Shane isn't mad at you. He got mad at Becky for saying that she was mad at you. He freaked out on her. He still loves you like the little sister you are to him and I." I smiled and Jason smiled. He was about to say something else, when Melissa and Becky came out of the room, glaring at me.

"Jase, you gotta get ready for the show." Jason nodded and got up. He helped me up and pulled me into the room. I saw CassieBella standing by Gavin holding his hand and looking at Shane. Gavin was talking to Shane. As soon as Shane saw me, he ran up and gave me a big hug. He smiled widely and started talking a mile a minute. Then he noticed CassieBella.

"Hi there sweetie! What's your name?" CassieBella blushed and quietly said her name, and then ran and his behind me.

"Aww. That's a pretty name sweetie." She blushed and hid behind me, and every now and then would look behind my legs to see if Shane was still there. Shane then looked at me and then at Nate and finally at CassieBella.

"She has your eyes, hair, smile and nose." Nate looked up and then glared at me. I felt some tears come to my eyes and looked down at CassieBella. I asked Gavin to take her for a mini walk, he nodded and he left. I looked at Nate and he looked at me.

"Why didn't you tell me that I had a daughter?" I glared at him and crossed my arms over my chest.

"You should've known Nate. Especially since I left because I didn't want to get an abortion." Nate walked over and stopped right in front of me.

"You should've told me Niki! I would've liked to be there when she was born!" I glared at him and Jason's eyes widened knowing that something big would happen.

"You would've liked to be there?? Nate you didn't even want her!!" Nate's glare intensified and he stepped closer.

"Well I still have a right to see her!" I glared at him and felt myself getting infuriated.

"Why should you Nate? Huh? Why should you be able to see my daughter? You're too busy being a Rockstar! You don't even have time to call you're wife!" Nate opened his mouth and was about to say something when I interrupted him.

"Nate. I waited for you to call! I waited by the phone. I waited for you to call and ask me to come back. If you would've just called and told me that you loved me, then I would've come back. But you didn't! I gave up then! I thought that you had moved on! I was broken! You ripped my heart in two! It's all your fault!" Everyone in the room was silent. They were all speechless. I glared at him with tear filled eyes. I was just about to say something else when Gavin and CassieBella came back.

"Mommy? What's wrong? Why are you crying?" I looked at her and said that nothing was wrong. She looked like she didn't believe me.

"Gavin, I have to take CassieBella and leave. I'm sorry." CassieBella looked at me and she looked really upset. It looked like she really wanted to stay.

"Niki, CassieBella was really looking forward to this concert. I'll take care of her. You go home and sleep, and I can drop her off later." I nodded and kissed CassieBella goodbye and left.

______________Gavin________________________

Gavin looked down at Nate and glared at him. Nate glared at Gavin and smiled lightly at CassieBella. Melissa and Becky glared at Gavin and CassieBella. Shane smiled at CassieBella and kneeled down in front of her.

"Hey again sweetie. I'm your Uncle Shane and that is your Uncle Jason." CassieBella looked up at Gavin and she gave Gavin a confused look.

"It's true they are. You see CassieBella, your mom is pretty much their adopted sister. Which makes them your Uncles." CassieBella smiled brightly and then hugged Shane and didn't let go of him. Shane laughed and kissed her forehead. Jason smiled and then looked at Nate. Nate stood there staring at CassieBella, not sure what to do. Gavin sighed and walked over to Nate and pulled him aside to talk to him.

"Nate, Niki had a good reason for not wanting you to know about CassieBella." Nate glared at Gavin.

"Well I'd really want to know her reasons. This is my daughter! I have a right to see her and be apart of her life!" Gavin rubbed his temples and sighed.

"Nate do you honestly think that Niki is going to want to have you in CassieBella's life after you said 'Niki just get the abortion. We can have kids later'?" Nate grimaced at what Gavin said he said.

"Well I still would've wanted to be apart of my daughters life!" Gavin glared at Nate and Nate glared back.

"Nate! You didn't call her or try and get a hold of her! You didn't try being with her or talking her into coming back. You forgot about your wife! You forgot about the love of your life because you were too busy being a rockstar." Nate glared at Gavin and pushed him back a little.

"Forgot? Forgot? I did not forget! I thought about her every single day that we were apart! I kept wishing and hoping that she would come back! I would stare at my phone and pray that she would call and say that she was coming home. But she didn't!" Gavin glared at Nate and shoved him back.

"Nate! You have no idea what she went through! You didn't have to leave your sisters and your best friends. You didn't have to give labour to that beautiful girl over there. You didn't have to struggle to make enough money to pay the bills. You didn't have to be a teenage mother without a father to help support her. So don't try and say that you had it worse." Nate was silent as Gavin went on.

"She was ready fro you to come back! She wanted you to come back! She wanted you in her life! But after the first couple weeks went by, she gave up. She knew that you weren't coming! So she didn't abandon you Nate! You abandoned her." Nate stared at Gavin with tears forming in his eyes. Gavin glared at Nate and walked back over to CassieBella and Jason and Shane.

"I still love her." Nate closed his eyes and whispered to himself.


	3. Chapter 3

If I can't Have you chapter 3: Broken

I didn't know what to do about Nate. I wanted to love him. I wanted to be in his arms. I wanted him to sing me to sleep. I wanted him to whisper sweet nothing's in my ear. I wanted to be his again. I just didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I should go back and talk to him, or just stay away from him.

I can't believe that he thought that I would call him. I walked out on him because he wanted to get rid of his child. I would never get rid of my child. And I thought that he wouldn't either. But he made it pretty clear that his parents are more important than his wife and child.

Sighing I got off of my bed and looked over at my clock. It was only 8:30. The concert would be half over by now. I didn't want to just sit here and do nothing. I wanted to go out but I couldn't bring myself too. I would get up, and get ready to go, and then I would turn around and walk back to my room. I felt guilty because I knew that me and Nate were still 'married'. I knew that CassieBella was expecting me to be awake. She wanted to tell me everything, and I wanted to listen. But I didn't. I just wanted to go out and be a normal girl.

I sighed and got up and went into the kitchen. I walked up to the freezer and pulled out some cookie dough. I grabbed a spoon and walked into the living room. I plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV. I turned to a romantic comedy and started watching it.

Halfway into the movie, I heard a knock on the door. I got up and walked over to the door. I looked in the peep hole and saw that it was Gavin, CassieBella and…Nate. I sighed and pulled open the door. CassieBella ran in and started jumping on the couch. Nate and Gavin walked in and Gavin stood there staring at me and Nate. He rolled his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Okay, you too. Talk. You need to talk. So talk now." Gavin walked off and I stared down at my feet. When Nate didn't say anything for a couple of minutes, I rolled my tearful eyes and walked off to my room. I heard Nate following me. I closed my door and sat on my bed.

I sat there for a couple of minutes, before Nate walked in. He stood in front of me and looked at me. I looked up at him and we just stared at eachother, in an awkward silence. I started playing with my hair and looked down at my feet. I wondered why he wasn't saying anything. I looked up and saw that he wasn't staring at me anymore. He was staring out the window.

"Niki, we need to talk." I nodded and Nate took a couple steps closer and sighed.

"Niki, I don't think you should have left." I stared at Nate and he looked at me, straight at me. I gave him an odd look, but he didn't move.

"Nate, you said that I should get an abortion. I wasn't about to kill my baby. She means a lot to me. I love her. I can't imagine my life without that sweet little girl out there." Nate ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

"Niki what about us?" I looked at him and he looked back at me.

"What about us?" He sighed and I'm pretty sure that he was getting frusterated.

"Our relationship depleated. We weren't together anymore. I mean we still aren't. I just wished that you would've called or tried keeping in touch. I loved you. I do love you." I stared at him and got pretty upset.

"Why did I have to be the one to call? Why couldn't you have called? Or tired getting in touch? Why did you have to shove me out of your life?" Nate stared in silence. So I continued.

"I waited Nate! I waited for weeks and weeks for the phone calls. But nothing came! Nothing! I gave ip! I gave up because you didn't want me anymore! You decided that your parents were more important than your wife!" Nate shook his head. I let silent tears fall down my face. I looked down and started crying again. I felt Nate come and sit by me. I felt him wrap his arms around my shoulders. I almost wanted to lean in, but I remembered what he did and why I shouldn't let him touch me.

"Will you just stop? Can you stop playing games?" Nate stared at me in bewilderment. I rolled my eyes and glared at him teary eyed.

"I can't do this Nate. I can't do this anymore. I can't see you everyday on TV and know that I can't be with you. I need to get away from you. I can't love you. I need you to love someone else." Nate stared at me and I let some more tears down my face.

"Niki, I came here to work everything out. I love you." I shook my head and took some steps backwards.

"No Nate. Don't say that." Nate looked at me funny, and steeped closer.

"Niki, I love you. I just want to be with you." I shook my head and took some more steps backwards. Nate held out his arms and started walking forward.

"Niki, I love you. I took my vows and said that I would never leave you. I'm trying to fix things." I shook my head and started sobbing. Nate hugged me, but I pushed out of his grasp.

"Niki, please. Forgive me. I'm trying to make this work. I want to make this work." I shook my head and pushed Nate back.

"Nate, don't love me. I know that we are married, but don't love me anymore. Divorce me." Nate's mouth fell open and he stared at me in shock.

"Niki, no. I love you and only you. I don't want anyone else!" I started sobbing uncontrollably and Nate went to comfort me again, but I pushed him away again.

"Nate! I don't want you to love me! You can do better!" Nate shook his head and went to speak, but I stopped him.

"I know that you can do better. I know that there is some lucky girl out there that can love you more than I ever could." Nate stared at me in shock.

"No, Niki, you are my dream girl. I can't be with anyone else. I love you and only you." I stared at him with tear filled eyes and took a deep breath trying to control myself.

"Nate, please just leave me. Please just do it." Nate shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Niki, give me a reason why I should leave you. And even if you do give me a reason, it's not like I actually would leave you." I felt hot tears fall down my cheeks and I took a deep breath.

"You want a reason Nate? Here is a reason. I'm not good enough for you." Nate groaned and ran his fingers through his hair and then sighed.

"Niki, if I thought that you weren't good for me, then I would never have married you." I sobbed and wiped away some tears.

"Nate, just leave me. Just divorce me. Find a girlfriend and fall in love with her." Nate sat down on my bed, and rubbed his temples.

"Niki for the last time, I will Not divorce you! I don't why or where you would get the stupid idea that I would divorce you. But I won't." I closed my eyes and got more persistent.

"Nate you and me, we are too different. I am not your dream girl. I am not the one that you are destined to be with. It's just not meant to be." Nate slammed his hands on the bed, and gripped the blankets.

"Niki! We are compatible! We are destined for eachother. I know we are!" wiped away some tears, but it was no use. They just kept falling.

"Nate, we aren't meant to be. I know it. I know that when we were separated all that time, we learned to almost live completely without eachother." Nate stood up quickly and stood in front of me.

"Fine! If that's what you want then fine! I will get a divorce from you! I will let your biggest dream come true! I am sick of having to try and convince you that we are made for eachother! I am just sick of it!" Nate turned around and was about to leave when he turned around and stared at me.

"If we get a divorce, I am getting custody of my daughter." As soon as Nate left, I collapsed on the floor, bawling my eyes out.

"Nate, it's better for the both of us this way." I sobbed and felt my heart, that was almost completely mended, shatter.


	4. Chapter 4: Wasted

Hey guys! So here is another chapter! I hope you like it. But there is something that you have to know. In the first story(arranged) Niki's mother died while giving birth to her. Well, I made a mistake. It was supposed to be that Niki's mother was supposed to die when she was around 10. So in this chapter, it will talk about something that her mother did when she was younger. So remember, Niki's mother wasn't suppose to die while giving birth, she was supposed to die when Niki was 10. Anyway so I would like to thank: **Consmuzzled** and **Megan** for reviewing. I hope that you guys like this chapter, and I hope that you guys will keep reviewing.

If I can't have you chapter 4: Wasted

I was tired of crying. I hated crying. I just felt so pathetic when I cried. I knew that crying was healthy for you, but crying as much as I did, couldn't be healthy. I asked Gavin if he could watch CassieBella for a few days. I just needed some time to be alone. He agreed, he loves CassieBella. CassieBella loves her 'uncle' Gavin. Plus she can hang out with Shane and Jason.

I needed to think about everything that has happened between me and Nate. I didn't want to cry over him anymore. I wanted to love him. But I didn't want my daughter to have to be living out of a bus. I know that Connect Three takes breaks, but I didn't want that for her. I wanted to make CassieBella's life as god as it could be. And it didn't involve a bus and waking up in a different city each day.

I sighed and picked up my pillow and threw it against the wall. Connect Three was going to be here for a week. Staying in a hotel, going shopping. Taking a break. I sighed and turned over, so that my stomach was on the bed. I needed to get out. I needed to be social.

I got off of the bed and got dressed. I brushed my teeth and pulled my hair into a ponytail. I grabbed a jacket zipped it up and slipped on some shoes. I grabbed my house key, my car keys and headed out. I hopped in my car and turned on the radio. I put on my seatbelt, and started singing to the radio, and riving down the street.

_Standing at the back door  
She tried to make it fast  
One tear hit the hard wood  
It fell like broken glass  
She said sometimes love slips away  
And you just can't get it back  
Let's face it  
_I realized that this song was almost exactly what happened between me and Nate. I took a deep breath and kept singing.

_  
For one split second  
She almost turned around  
But that would be like pouring rain drops  
Back into a cloud  
So she took another step and said  
I see the way out and I'm gonna' take it_

I don't wanna' spend my life jaded  
Waiting to wake up one day and find  
That I've let all these years go by  
Wasted

Another glass of whisky but it still don't kill the pain  
So he stumbles to the sink and pours it down the drain  
He says it's time to be a man and stop living for yesterday  
Gotta face it.

Cause' I don't wanna' spend my life jaded  
Waiting to wake up one day and find  
That I've let all these years go by  
Wasted

Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing  
The still of the morning, the color of the night  
I ain't spending no more time  
Wasted

She kept drivin' along  
Till the moon and the sun were floating side-by-side  
He looked in the mirror and his eyes were clear  
For the first time in a while

Hey, yeah,  
Oh, I don't wanna' spend my life jaded  
Waiting to wake up one day and find  
That I've let all these years go by  
Wasted

Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing  
The still of the morning, the color of the night  
I ain't spending no more time  
Wasted

Oh, I don't wanna' spend my life jaded  
Waiting to wake up one day and find  
That I've let all these years go by  
Wasted

Yeah, yeah  
Oh I don't wanna' keep on wishing, missing  
The still of the morning, the color of the night  
I ain't spending no more time  
Wasted

I smiled and blinked away some tears, and just kept driving. I didn't know where I was going, but that felt good. Going nowhere. I felt myself smile and I blinked back some more tears. But these were happy tears. I knew what was important in my life. My friends, my daughter, and even though they hated me, my sisters. I didn't want them to hate me, but they did. I looked at the clock, and decided that I should turn around and go back to my house. I looked around and noticed that I was on the outskirts of the city. I pulled into a parking lot, and was about to turn around and go back, when I noticed a store. I parked and got out of the car. I walked into the store and smiled.

The store was full, of instruments. There were guitars, drums, pianos, and bass guitars. I walked over to the acoustic guitars and picked one up. It was a light brown and had light red, trim around it. It was polished, and had some music notes on the side. I loved it. I looked for a price tag and found it. I smiled when I found out that the price was only $95. I picked it up, and was about to walk away, when I saw another littler guitar. It was almost the exact same, except that it was for a child. I picked it up, looked at the price and went to buy it. I walked up to the till, and an old guy came up to the till. He smiled and then looked down and looked up again.

"Nicole Harrison." I nodded and the old guy smiled widely.

"How do you know me?" the old guy smiled and I was starting to get a little creeped out.

"Your mom, used to own this shop. This used to be hers. She was the owner. She brought you in here when you were younger and she would let you play every single instrument. Your sisters didn't really like playing the instruments." I smiled and the old guy smiled and rang up the total.

"You know, that guitar that you have right now, that's your mom's guitar. I put a price tag on it, but never sold it. I didn't want to sell it. It was your mom's so I thought that you should have it. I just didn't know if you would ever come in here." I nodded and smiled.

"oh yeah by the way, I'm Jack." I smiled and shook his hand. He smiled and rang up the total. I looked at the price and then looked at him oddly.

"I'm not going to charge you for your mother's guitar. It is rightfully yours." I smiled and said thank you and was about to leave, when Jack stopped me.

"Wait! Niki! Your mother, had put in her will, that if anything were to happen, that you were to get the store. The store would under your ownership. If you want it that is." I nodded and walked back over to the counter.

"Who owns it now?" Jack smiled and pointed to himself.

"I am owning it right now. But as soon as you want to take control of the shop, then I'll step down." I smiled and thought for a bit.

"How about you be co-owner?" Jack smiled and said that that was perfectly alright.

"So you're going t take control of the shop?" I looked at him and shrugged lightly.

"I will definitely consider it." Jack smiled and I said thank you and that I would be back tomorrow, maybe.

I got into the car, and couldn't stop smiling. I couldn't believe that my mom owned a shop! I mean I guess that my dad helped in it, but my mom was the owner. I sighed and turned up the radio.

I finally got home after a couple minutes, and got the guitars and took them inside. I set them down on the couch, and called CassieBella. Her and Gavin came bounding down the stairs. Both were smiling. I kissed CassieBella's forehead.

"Guess what sweetie?" She smiled up at me and asked what.

"I have a surprise for you!" CassieBella smiled and started jumping up and down. I pulled out the guitar, and saw her eyes light up. She gently held it, and touched the strings.

"Mommy! I love it! I can't wait to learn how to play!" I smiled brightly and watched as she ran off.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys! So here is another chapter. I hope that you guys like this one. I would like to thank **Megan** for reviewing and I hope that you this chapter.

If I can't Have you Chapter 5

I didn't know what to do. I didn't know if I should take ownership of the shop, or leave it to Jack. I wanted to take ownership, but I didn't know if I was cut out to do that. Plus I had to get this whole thing with Nate sorted out. I mean, apparently he still 'loves me', but I didn't know if I wanted to believe that.

I sighed and rubbed my temples. I didn't know what to do. Gavin was nice enough to take care of CassieBella again today. I just needed time to think. I needed a couple of days. I needed…I needed. Oh I didn't know what I needed.

I got off of my bed and went over to my guitar and picked it up. I went outside of my room, down my steps and out the door. I sat on my front steps and started playing.

_What you got if you ain't got love?  
The kind that you just wanna give away  
It's okay to open up  
Go ahead and let the light shine through  
_I didn't really want to open up. I already opened up to Gavin, but he can only help so much.

_  
I know it's hard on a rainy day  
You wanna shut the world out  
And just be left alone  
But don't run out on your faith  
_I wanted to be left alone a lot. But I'm glad that Gavin wouldn't leave me alone. He was actually helping me get through this mess. He was my best friend.

_  
'Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing  
Is just a grain of sand  
And what you've been out there searching for forever  
Is in your hands  
_I just so happened to be climbing a whole bunch of mountains. And it seemed like it was one after the other, all the time.

_  
And when you figure out  
Love is all that matters after all  
It sure makes everything else  
Seem so small  
_I needed to be loved like Nate used to love me. I needed to feel that way again. I just didn't know who would love me like that.

_  
It's so easy to get lost inside  
A problem that seems so big at the time  
It's like a river that's so wide  
It swallows you whole  
_I got lost so many times. I can't count how many times. But I'm glad that I did. Otherwise, I wouldn't be the person that I am today.

_  
While you're sitting around thinking 'bout what you can't change  
And worrying about all the wrong things  
Time's flying by, moving so fast  
You better make it count 'cause you can't get it back  
_I know that I can't change things. I can't change what happened between me and Nate. I can't change my beautiful daughter being born. So I guess that I should make the most out of life, and make CassieBella's life the best that it can be.

_  
Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing  
Is just a grain of sand  
And what you've been out there searching for forever  
Is in your hands_

Oh, and when you figure out  
Love is all that matters after all  
It sure makes everything else  
Seem so small!

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing  
Is just a grain of sand  
And what you've been out there searching for forever  
Is in your hands

And then you figure out  
Love is all that matters after all  
It sure makes everything else  
Oh, it sure makes everything else  
Seem so small

I sighed and played the final cords of the song. I had a better idea of what I had to do. But I still wasn't sure. But I knew that whatever happened, that CassieBella and I would be okay.

_____________________Meanwhile___________________

Gavin sat in front of Melissa, Becky, Nate and his parents, whit his arms crossed over his chest. He looked over to where Shane and Jason were playing with CassieBella and smiled. Then he turned back towards everyone and glared at them.

"We are still mad at her." Gavin looked at Melissa and glared at her with a look of disgust.

"Melissa shut up for once will you!" Melissa clamped her jaw shut but glared at Gavin.

"Hey! She can say what she wants to!" Gavin looked over at Becky and glared at her too. She rolled her eyes and sighed.

"No she can't! She has no idea what Niki has been through!" Melissa rolled her eyes and looked at her nails.

"She had gotten pregnant at the age of 17. Her husband and his parents told her to get an abortion, or lose connections to his family. She ran away, and had to finish highschool on the internet. She had to struggle to come up with enough money to provide for her beautiful daughter. Even with my help, she had to struggle. She didn't accept much money from me." Becky snorted and Gavin gave her a death glare, and she finally shut up.

"Not only that, but her husband, who she was completely and totally in love with, didn't even try and convince her to come back. And don't even start with the whole, she could've called me thing Nate. She was heartbroken, alone and with your child." Nate looked down guilty. His parents looked guilty, but Melissa and Becky didn't.

"I'm still mad at her." Gavin rolled his eyes and stared at Melissa.

"Oh yeah? And for what?" Melissa scoffed and took a deep breath.

"First of all, she abandoned me and Becky. I mean what kind of sister does that?" Gavin was about to respond, when Melissa told him to shut it.

"Secondly, she didn't even try and let Nate see HIS child. I mean he has a right to his child. The same and equal right as Niki has." Gavin glared at her and she glared back.

"Melissa. Nate wasn't involved in CassieBella's life since the day that she was born. Why should he get an equal right to see his child? Secondly, she has a name and it's CassieBella. So I'd appreciate it if you would call her by that name. And not by 'the child' or 'his child'." Melissa looked at her nails, blew on them and looked back up at Gavin.

"Oh I'm sorry, did you say something?" Gavin clenched his fists. Becky looked at Nate and Nate was silent. She looked a little closer, and saw some tears in his eyes. Becky looked down at her shoes and sighed. She looked at Melissa and saw Melissa getting ready to say something else.

"Nate should get full custody of CassieBella." Gavin looked shocked and his jaw dropped. Nate looked at Melissa and then at Gavin.

"No! He cannot take CassieBella out of Niki's life! Niki gave birth to her! She cares for her! CassieBella is Niki's whole life. And nobody is going to take that away from her!" Melissa took a deep breath and looked over at Becky. Becky stayed silent, and just looked down at her feet.

"Niki is not fit to be having custody of her! You said yourself that Niki had hard times coming up with enough money. Nate is famous and has lots of money. Nate could give CassieBella the life that she really needs." Gavin glared at Melissa and then looked at Nate. He stared at Nate and shook his head.

"Melissa, you keep saying how Niki abandoned you. But really, you abandoned her. You all did. I can't blame her for not wanting anything to do with you anymore."

Author note:

Hey guys! So I was wondering how many of you would like to see Niki and Nate together again. So please review and let me know if you think that Niki and Nate should be together again and why. And if you don't think that they should, then review and tell me why. Thanks a whole bunch!


	6. Chapter 6

Hey guys! So here is another chapter. I hope that you guys really like this one. I want to thank the reviewers. **Team M, Megan, Lozzii, muzzy power!!!**, and **OneToughCookie** for reviewing, and giving your thoughts and comments. And yes Melissa and Becky aren't so nice in this story. But there will be a change! They will be back to normal!

If I can't have you chapter 6

I was still thinking about the shop. Whether to take over it or not. I wanted to I really did. But I didn't want to make life harder for CassieBella. I just wanted her to be happy and have a good life. I didn't want to spoil her, but I wanted her to have everything that she needed to succeed in life.

The one thing that I couldn't get for her was a father. I couldn't seem to get myself onto the dating scene again. And I couldn't bring myself to talk to Nate again. I didn't know what to. There was one sure thing and that was that I was still in love with Nate. I needed to talk to him. I needed to work this out. I needed my husband.

I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and dialed Nate's cell phone number. I had it memorised so that way I could always have it if I didn't have my cell phone. I heard it ring and ring and ring. I didn't think that he was going to pick up, until he did.

"Niki? Niki! Don't hang up the phone!" Well there goes my plan.

"Hello Nate." I didn't want to sound mean and cold hearted. I wanted to sound like normal.

"Niki, we have to talk. We need to talk. Niki, I'm coming over to your house." I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. Nate had already hung up and I could already see him driving here. I looked around my house and saw that it was slightly messy. I ran around trying to pick up stuff, when Nate knocked on the door. I slowly opened it and let him in.

"Hey Niki." I mumbled a hello and finished scrubbing the counter. I didn't look up or t him. Nate walked in and sat down at the table. I gripped the cloth tightly and the only thing that I wanted to do was yell at Nate.

"How are you?" I turned around and crossed my arms over my chest. I glared at him and he looked nervous. I just kept glaring at him knowing that he had a reason to be afraid.

"Do you like playing games and making me miserable?" Nate looked at me confused and I had to stop myself from rolling me eyes.

"Niki, what are you talking about?" I scoffed at Nate's nice voice and attitude. I thought that it was all an act.

"Oh come on Nate! Don't play stupid!" Nate looked at me with a confused look and I felt myself getting more and more frustrated.

"Nate! If you think that you can just come back into my life and take my daughter away from me, then you can just go and screw it. Because you are not taking her away from me!" Nate sat there and looked awkward.

"Niki, she is my daughter too you know." I glared at him and gripped the counter. I cannot believe it.

"Nate! You didn't want her! You didn't want to be in her life! You didn't want to be in my life! As far as I'm concerned, you shouldn't even get to know her!" Nate stared at me and got up and walked over to me. He wrapped his arms around me and I pushed him away and walked away from him.

"Nate! Stop it! You can't just hug me and think that everything is going to be fine. Because it's not. Nothing is going to be the way it was!" Nate looked at me and then walked closer.

"Niki, I made a mistake. I love you. I always have. I've always loved you. Since the day that I saw you I've loved you. I want to make this work. I want us to be together again." I turned away from him and let some tears fall I looked back at him and shook my head.

"Nate, you can't just say things like that and expect it to happen. You have to know if the other person wants the same thing that you do!" Nate looked down and then back up. He smiled nervously.

"Niki, I love you." I looked at him and seen him smile. I let some more tears fall and finally snapped.

"Nate! Get out!" Nate looked at me horrified and shook his head.

"Niki, why?" I glared at him and pushed him back when he tried to hug me.

"I can't take it! I can't take all of your lies! I can't take you making promises and not keeping them! Just…just get out!" Nate shook his head and I collapsed on the ground and began sobbing. I let my tears fall and didn't care to see if Nate had left or not.

"Niki, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving you. I'm sorry for saying that I wanted you to get rid of CassieBella. I just didn't know what to do. I mean my parents said that it was too early to have kids. And I believed them for a second. But after you left, I knew that what my parents said wasn't true. It wasn't too early. It was the perfect time." I sat there and sobbed. I felt Nate sit down beside me, but was to occupied crying, to tell him to move. I felt him wrap and arm around my shoulders, but I didn't move it. I liked the feeling of having him near me. I loved the feeling of having a guy care for me like he did.

"Nate! I waited for you! I waited for you but you never came! I was broken and alone! I was a 17 year old mother who was married but had no husband with her! I had to take internet courses to graduate highschool. I had to find a job, and take care of CassieBella b myself! I was alone!" I started sobbing again and Nate just nodded and I started crying on his chest. He wrapped both his arms around me and held me as I cried. I felt secure, safe and warm.

"Niki, I can't tell you enough, how sorry I am that I left you. I am sorry for leaving you and our beautiful baby girl. I love you both. And I realise that I was being an idiot. I really am sorry." I nodded and calmed down quite a bit. I was still crying, but now only tears were falling from my eyes. Nate kissed the top of my head and I closed my eyes, and started falling asleep.

However, just as I was falling asleep, Nate shook me gently. He smiled down at me as I looked up at him and stretched and yawned. I stood up and he followed. I closed my eyes again for a few seconds and then looked at Nate.

"I was just about to fall asleep. Why did you wake me up?" Nate smiled widely and I knew that there was something that he wanted.

"I want to officially meet me daughter. I mean I know that I've met her. But I haven't met her as her daddy. I smiled and walked to the front door. I slipped on my shoes and walked out the door. I turned around locked it, and drove to the hotel.

When Nate and I got to the hotel, I got out and was about to walk away, when Nate stopped me. He reached over and grabbed my hand. He brought it to his lips and kissed my hand lightly.

"I love you Mrs. Grey." I giggled and he smiled. We started walking towards the lobby, when he wrapped and arm around me waist and pulled me close. I smiled and blushed lightly. Nate smiled and opened the door for me. We walked to the elevator and got in.

We got out of the elevator and Nate pulled me down a hallway. He stopped at the door at the end and smiled. He opened the door and pulled me inside. We were greeted by Shane, Jason and Nate's parents. They all smiled and Nate leaned over to give me a kiss on the cheek.

"We worked everything out. We are no longer going to be inseparable. Niki, CassieBella and I are going to be a family." They all smiled wide, and I started blushing. I then saw CassieBella running towards me. She pushed her way through the people standing in front of her. I picked her up and kissed her cheek.

"Mommy!" I smiled and looked over at Nate. Nate also had a wide smile on. I knew that he wanted to hold her, but I wasn't sure how she would react.

"CassieBella, you know how I didn't want to tell you where Daddy was?" She nodded and I took a deep breath.

"Well how would you like to know who Daddy is?" CassieBella smiled widely and nodded her head. I laughed a little and told her to calm down.

"Well sweetie, your Daddy is…" I was interrupted by CassieBella.

"Mommy! Tell me please!" I laughed and kissed her forehead.

"Of course sweetie." She giggled and I smiled nervously.

"CassieBella, your Daddy is Nate." Her eyes widened and she looked at me and then at Nate. At first I thought that she wouldn't believe me or that she wouldn't take to him well.

"Nate of Connect Three is my daddy?" I nodded and Nate smiled brightly. CassieBella smiled and I looked over to Nate.

"Hi sweetie." CassieBella smiled and put her arms out, signalling Nate to take her. Nate smiled and she hugged Nate tightly.

"Daddy, promise not to leave Mommy and me ever again." Nate smiled and hugger her back.

"I promise sweetie. I will never leave you or your mom ever again. I love you both." I smiled and Nate reached out and took my hand.

"I love you Daddy!" I smiled and felt tears come to my eyes. Finally, we could be a real family.


	7. Chapter 7: The Sweetest Little Angel

Hey guys! So here is another chapter. I hope that you guys like it. I want to thank: Consmuzzled for reviewing. In this story CassieBella is very innocent and she says a lot of innocent and cute things. Especially in this chapter. Anyway I hope that you guys like this chapter.

If I Can't Have You Chapter 7: The sweetest little angel

Nate and I had made up. CassieBella, Nate and I, we were a family now. Nate and I fixed everything between us and we acted like nothing had ever happened between us. CassieBella was glad to now have a daddy. She was even happier that he was Connect Three.

CassieBella was Nate's little princess. His baby girl. He couldn't wait to spend more time with her when he had to do something else. Nate also couldn't wait until we were going to go on tour again. Because then he could see her every single day. And CassieBella was excited too. Everyone was excited.

"Sweetie, you can't take that many toys. You need to pack more clothes." CassieBella smiled brightly and continued packing some more toys. I sighed and picked her up and set her on her bed. I dumped all of her toys on the floor and packed some clothes. CassieBella sat there watching me in wonder.

"Mommy, when is Daddy going to be home?" I looked at her and smiled as she was playing with her pigtails.

"Soon sweetie." She smiled brightly and jumped off of the bed and picked up one of her toys. I smiled and continued packing her clothes. A couple minutes later, Nate walked into the room and leaned on the door frame. I looked up at him, and smiled brightly. He chuckled and walked over and kissed my cheek. Then finally CassieBella noticed Nate. She smiled, got up and ran and jumped into Nate's arms.

"Daddy! You're home!" Nate smiled and kissed her cheek and smiled.

"Yeah Sweetie." CassieBella smiled and then started squirming in his arms. Nate smiled and let her go. She got down and went to where her toys were. She picked up a doll, and then showed it to Nate.

"Daddy! Daddy look!" He smiled and nodded and CassieBella continued.

"Daddy, when Mommy has another baby, what are we going to name her?' Nate looked at me and then raised his eyebrows. I shrugged and he picked up CassieBella, and held her close.

"Well, sweetie, I don't know if your mom and I are going to have another baby." CassieBella looked at Nate with big wide blue eyes, and her smile faltered.

"But Daddy! Mommy said that she wanted to have more kids! And I need to have a baby sister to play with!" Nate looked at CassieBella and then back up at me. I knew that he wanted to promise that we would have more kids from the look on his face.

"Well, Niki, hunny, do you want to have more kids?" I looked at him and down at CassieBella and then back up at Nate.

"Yeah of course. I would love to have more kids." CassieBella smiled widely and hopped off of Nate's lap.

"Yay!! I'm going to have a sister!" She ran out of the room, smiling widely. I smiled and then Nate, grabbed my hand and kissed it lightly.

_______Becky and Shane_______

Becky sat on the edge of the bathtub and stared at herself in the mirror. She just simply sat there staring at herself dazed. She was deep in thought, thinking about what was going to happen when Shane found out.

"Becky? Hon? Where are you?" Becky shook her head and cleared her head of thoughts.

"Sitting in the bathroom Shane." Shane walked in and kissed Becky on the cheek and then kissed her on the lips.

"What are you doing anyway?" Becky was about to say something and then she shook her head and forced a smile. Shane looked at her with a confused look and then shrugged it off. He grabbed her arm and helped her up.

"Come on. Let's go out on a date." Becky shook her head and pulled her arm away. Shane turned around and looked at her. She looked down at her feet and then back up at Shane.

"We have to talk." Shane looked worried and he took a step towards Becky.

"You don't want a divorce do you?" Becky shook her head and Shane sighed in relief.

"Shane, something happened." Shane stepped closer to Becky and he looked extremely worried.

"What happened? Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself?" Becky shook her head and Shane looked confused again.

"I don't get it. What happened?" Becky took a deep breath and then looked at Shane.

"You better sit down." Shane nodded and he and Becky went and sat down on the couch.

"Okay so, what happened?" Becky looked at Shane and then down at her feet. She didn't know how to say it or what to say. She looked back up at Shane and took a deep breath.

"Shane, I'm pregnant." Shane stared at her and she got a little worried that he would freak out. Becky went to say something, when Shane suddenly fainted.

__________Meanwhile_______

Gavin stood at my door, holding Cassie, and some of her toys. He also had a pair of clothes and some pyjama's, and her pillow. Cassie thought that she was just going to spend some time with her Uncle Gavin before going on tour. But that was only half of it.

"Yes Nate. I will take care of CassieBella. She will be safe, and no harm will come to her." Nate nodded in approval and Gavin rolled his eyes.

"CassieBella, say by to Mommy and Daddy." Cassie nodded and she held out her arms. I took her and kissed her cheek.

"By sweetie! Have fun with Uncle Gavin." She nodded and I smiled. Nate held out his arms so Cassie went to him.

"Have fun princess." Cassie giggled and nodded.

"I will Daddy. I love you Daddy, I love you Mommy!" I kissed her cheek one final time, and then Gavin grabbed her hand and led her out to the car. I turned around and went back inside. I shut the door, and Nate locked it.

"Nate, Gavin knows what he's doing. He knows how to babysit Cassie." Nate nodded and came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"I know that sweetie. I'm just protective over my daughter." I nodded and turned my head. Nate connected out lips, and we kissed momentarily.

"So Mrs. Grey, it's just you and me tonight." I nodded and Nate rested his head on my head and sighed contently.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" I nodded and Nate led me to the couch. He put in a movie and sat beside me. Nate grabbed my hand and we intertwined fingers. I rested my head against Nate's chest and he wrapped an arm around my shoulder.

Halfway through the movie, Nate ended up kissing me lightly. Which turned into a deeper kiss. Which turned into making out. Which turned into us laying on my bed, talking.

"I love you so much, Mrs. Nicole Grey." I smiled and Nate kissed my lips lightly.

"And I love you Mr. Nathaniel Grey." Nate smiled and I looked up at him and he looked down at me.

"Niki, how many kids do you want to have? Because I have always wanted a big family, but if you don't want a big family then we don't have to have a big family." I giggled and looked at Nate and kissed his lips.

"I want four or five kids Nate." Nate smiled and kissed me lightly at first and then deepening the kiss. I broke the kiss and Nate looked at me confused.

"Nate, I want to get pregnant again." Nate smiled and pulled me down against him.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey guys! Here is another chapter. I hope that you like it. I want to thank: **Consmuzzled**, **Megan, ** and **Lozzii **for reviewing. I hope that you guys like this chapter.

If I Can't Have You Chapter 8

I slowly opened my eyes and blinked a couple of times. I looked over to where I thought that Nate should be. But he wasn't there. I slowly sat up and looked down. I pulled the blanket up to my neck, and then wrapped the blanket around myself. I looked on the floor and found my clothes. I picked them up and put them into the laundry basket.

I walked back into my room and went over to my closet. I open my closet and pulled out a shirt. I looked at it and then smiled. It was one of Nate's shirts that he left here from times before. I threw it on my bed and then walked to my dresser. I grabbed a bra and underwear. I pulled open another drawer and pulled out some dark blue skinny jeans. I grabbed all of my clothes and walked into the bathroom. I quickly had a shower and towel dried my hair.

Once I was finished getting dressed, I did the rest. I brushed my hair, untangling any knots in my hair. I ran my fingers through my hair to make sure that all of the knots were gone. I smiled, and opened the bathroom door. I walked down the stairs and saw Nate standing in the kitchen, cooking.

He saw me, smiled and dropped whatever he was holding. He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly. Nate kissed me neck and then put his head on my head.

"You smell really good Niki. You smell like vanilla. I like vanilla." I smiled and giggled and Nate smiled and kissed the top of my head. Then he pulled away and walked back to the stove and started cooking again.

"Baby, what do you want for breakfast?" I looked at Nate, shocked.

"I didn't know that you could cook." Nate smiled and nodded.

"People can surprise you. And baby, I will surprise you with my mad cooking skills." I laughed and Nate rolled his eyes and returned to cooking. I didn't think that this was going to end well. I just smiled at Nate, and couldn't help but feel like the luckiest girl alive. Nate was such a sweetheart, and even though he couldn't cook, it was the thought that counted.

____________half an hour later___________

Nate threw the pan into the sink and shut off the stove. He glared at the pan and crossed his arms over his chest. I giggled and stood beside him and looked at him.

"Nate, it's fine." Nate glared at the sink and the pan, with a death glare.

"No it's not. How am I supposed to cook food for you when you're too tired too. Or when you're busy taking care of our kids." I walked in front of him and stood there. I leaned up and kissed his lips lightly. Nate smiled and stopped glaring at the sink and the pan. He uncrossed his arms and wrapped them around my waist. He pulled me closer and held me there.

"Did I mention that you and CassieBella are the best things that ever happened to me?" I shook my head and Nate smiled. Nate hadn't ever mentioned that. He had said that he loved us.

"Well, it's true. You and CassieBella are the best things that ever happened to me." I smiled shyly and blushed. I looked up at Nate and he looked down at me. I put my head on his chest and closed my eyes.

"I love you so much Nate."

___________Becky, Shane, Melissa and Jason________

Jason stared at Melissa, who was staring at Becky, who was staring at Shane. Shane sat there with a huge smile on his face. Jason and Melissa didn't know why. And they weren't any good at guessing. Becky knew why, and she was nervous to tell everybody the big news. She didn't want Melissa to freak out. Becky took a deep breath and looked at everybody.

"I have something to tell you." Everyone nodded and they gave Becky their full attention.

"I…I'm pregnant." Becky looked at everyone's expressions, and looked extremely nervous.

"I am so happy for you! You're going to have a baby!" Becky sighed a breath of relief when she saw Melissa's face light up. She looked at Jason's expression and it was happy. Shane was beaming at Becky, but glaring at Melissa.

"Wow Melissa." Melissa turned to look at Shane and gave him an odd look.

"What?" Shane glared at her and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Don't you think that it's a little hypocritical of you to be happy for Becky when she's pregnant and then go and shove Niki out of your life when she's pregnant?" Melissa rolled her eyes and Becky stared at Shane and then at Melissa.

"It's not the same thing." Shane rolled his eyes again and sighed.

"Melissa it is the exact same thing!" Melissa crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Shane.

"How is it the same thing Shane? Huh? Becky isn't 17 and pregnant. She is 21 and pregnant." Shane glared at her and took a step closer.

"You know what Melissa?" Melissa stepped closet to Shane and glared at him.

"What Shane?" Shane looked at Jason and Becky. They were standing there looking awkward.

"You are the worst sister. Ever. You pick favourites. You isolate the sister that isn't your favourite. You don't deserve to be Niki's sister. She's too good for you." Melissa's eyes narrowed and she glared intensely at Shane. She turned around, grabbed Jason's hand and walked out of the hotel room. Becky sighed and laid down on the bed. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

______________The Next Day____________

I sat on the bathroom floor, with my back against the wall, taking deep breaths. I was throwing up a lot, and I knew that that could mean two things. One I had the flu or had food poisoning. Or two, I was pregnant again.

"Niki, baby, are you okay?" I looked up to see Nate standing above me, looking concerned.

"Nate, I was throwing up. Does it look like I'm okay?" Nate smiled and sat down beside me.

"You know, when you do pregnant, I'm going to be there to witness everything. I wasn't there the first time, but I'm making darn sure to be there for this one." I nodded and rested my head on Nate's shoulder. Nate kissed the tope of my head and sat there, watching me relax. I was about to say something, when I scrambled over to the toilet, and threw up. Nate held my hair up and started rubbing my back comfortingly.

Once I was done throwing up at the moment. I smiled and rubbed my temples. Nate smiled and pushed my hands away and then kissed my temples. I turned my head away and Nate pouted.

"Baby, angel, you love getting your temples kissed." I shook my head and looked down at my feet.

"I don't love it right now. Right now, it annoys me." Nate smiled and held my hand. He brought it up to his lips and kissed my hand. I smiled and slowly started getting up. Nate followed and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. He kissed my temple, and I swatted his hand away.

"Nate stop it." Nate chuckled and I pouted a little.

"Nate, get out." Nate looked at me and his eyes widened a little.

"Niki, come on. I'll stop just don't make me leave again." I looked at Nate oddly and shook my head.

"Nate, I'm going to take a pregnancy test. Get out of the bathroom." Nate nodded and turned around and walked out of the bathroom.


	9. Chapter 9

Hey guys! Here is another chapter. I want to apologize for the wait. I've been really busy. But I am going to try and be more consistent. Anyway…I want to thank the reviewers: **Consmuzzled**, and **Megan** for reviewing. I really appreciate the reviews. I hope you guys like this chapter.

If I can't have you chapter 9

I sat on the toilet and waited for the tests to be done. I kept the door closed so that Nate would have to wait just like I have to. I could hear him pacing outside the door, and that just made me laugh. Nate was so impatient. It was kind of amusing.

"Niki, baby, please hurry!" I rolled my eyes and sighed. No matter how much I tried to explain to that boy that I couldn't make the test work faster, he never listened.

"Nate! I told you before! I can't make the pregnancy test, test faster! You'll just have to be patient!" Nate sighed and I giggled a little. I shook my head and slowly stood up. I grabbed the tests and laid them about. I picked one up, read it and put it back down. I did that with every single one, and then walked to the door. I opened the door, and leaned on the door frame. Nate turned around and looked at me.

"Niki, baby, hunny, tell me what they said…." Stared at him and he walked closer. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. He leaned down and kissed my lips lightly.

"Niki, my sweet angel, please tell me what they said." I looked up at him and then looked down again.

"Nate…" I looked up at him and he looked down at me nervously.

"Nate…it said…WE ARE GOING TO HAVE ANOTHER BABY!" Nate broke out into a smile. He wrapped his arms around me tighter. He picked me up, and swung me around. He put me down and kissed my lips; he deepened the kiss, and then touched our foreheads together.

"Niki, did I mention how much I love you?" I nodded and Nate kissed my lips lightly. Nate put his hand to my stomach and smiled widely.

"I love our little baby already." I nodded and rested my head on his shoulder. He kissed the top of my head, and sighed. We stayed like that for a little while longer, but then we heard the front door open. We heard little feet running in, and we knew that our dear daughter Cassie was home. Nate and I went downstairs and was met by Cassie, sitting on the couch, smiling. She ran towards us and Nate picked her up.

"Mommy! Daddy! I'm back! Did you miss me?" Nate and I smiled, and nodded.

"Indeed we did sweetheart." Cassie smiled and Nate kissed her forehead. Cassie held out her arms and I grabbed her from Nate.

"What did you do at Uncle Gavin's house?" Cassie thought for a bit, and then answered.

"We watched a whole bunch of movies. There was this one movie and this guy got all chopped up. It wasn't a very nice movie." I nodded to Cassie and then looked at Nate. Nate smiled at Cassie and told her to go up to her room and put away her toys and clothes. She nodded and bounded off as soon as she was put down. I looked at Nate and crossed my arms over my chest.

"A scary movie Nate! How could Gavin do that to a poor little girl?" Nate shrugged and I sighed. I went and sat down on the couch and massaged my temples.

"Nate? How are we going to do this? We are going on tour. I'm pregnant." Nate sat beside me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. He kissed the side of my head, then gently held my hand.

"Don't worry angel. We'll work it out." I nodded and sat there, until I realised something.

"Nate? Are you ready to tell Cassie the good news?" He nodded and stood up. He looked at me and smiled.

"Cassie! Come here for a minute sweetie. Your mommy and I have something to tell you." I heard Cassie drop her toys and come running down the hall. Well here goes nothing.

____________Shane and Becky__________

Shane sat there in the hotel room holding Becky's hair back as she was going through morning sickness. She sat back against the wall, and Shane rubbed her arm comfortingly.

"Shane! How am I supposed to survive this? How can someone survive through this? Cause I would really like to know!" Shane smiled at Becky and began running his fingers through her hair. Becky moved closer and sighed. Shane knew that that always made Becky feel better.

"Becky there is someone that you could talk to about this kind of stuff." Becky looked at Shane like she was desperate to know. Which she was.

"WHO?? TELL ME WHO??" Shane laughed at Becky and she pouted at him.

"Becky, Niki went through it all. She went through morning sickness. She went trough cravings. Everything. Maybe you should ask her how she survived." Becky nodded and then sighed. She looked down at her lap and started rubbing her tummy.

"But Shane, everything that I'd done to her. I abandoned her." Shane pulled her close and kissed her head.

"She's your sister Becks. She'll forgive you. She's really forgiving once you apologize and mean it." Becky nodded and looked up at Shane. She looked down at her and kissed the top of her head.

"Shane, what if she doesn't forgive me? What if she shuts me out of her life like I did to her?" Shane sighed and rested his head on Becky's head.

"Baby, believe me. She won't. she'll forgive you. Believe me." Becky nodded and then she froze, she leaned over the toilet and threw up again. Shane shook his head, got up and left the bathroom. A couple minutes later, he came back into the bathroom holding the phone. He sat down beside Becky again and she sighed. She grabbed the phone and dialed my number. A couple seconds later, Nate picked up.

"Hello Becky." Becky sat there shocked she couldn't believe that Nate knew that it was her.

"Umm… Hi Nate…Is Niki there?" Becky sat there hoping that I was. She didn't hear anything, and then she heard a voice.

"What do you want Becky?" Becky gulped and then looked down at her tummy and back up.

"Niki, I'm sorry. I really am." Becky sat there waiting for a response.

"I know that. I forgave you like a week ago." Becky broke out into a smile and let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh good. Anyways so um…I have morning sickness. And it's evil. I want to know how you survived." Becky heard laughing coming from the line, and she glared at the phone. This was not a time to be laughing!

"Becky! I am pregnant again! I haven't had morning sickness yet. I'm expecting it tomorrow though." Becky sighed, and said congratulations. But that wasn't going to help her.

"Becky, you have to wait it out. You can't really do anything to help it. And despite what people say, soda crackers and ginger ale don't help. They make it worse." Becky said okay and then sighed. She handed the phone to Shane and started again on the morning sickness.

"We have to go. Thanks for the help Niki!" She hung up the phone and held Becky's hair up some more. He sat there and tried to ignore the sounds that she was making. Becky finally stopped and looked at Shane. She got up, left the bathroom and walked to the couch. She plopped down and crossed her arms over her chest. She looked up at Shane and then tilted her head to the side.

"Shaney! Me and baby are hungry!" Shane sat down beside Becky and kissed her cheek.

"What do you want to eat baby?" Becky thought for a minute before answering.

"I wan Taco Bell, McDonald's, Wendy's and Subway." Shane's eyes widened and she stared at Becky with his jaw dropped.

"Becky! Why so much?" Becky stared at Shane innocently.

"Shaney! I have to feed two people! And our baby wants McDonald's, Wendy's, Subway and Taco Bell!" Shane sighed and nodded. Becky shot up and walked to the door; she opened it and ran out to the car.

"The things I do for my wife." Shane mumbled to himself before closing the door behind him and locking it.


	10. Chapter 10

Hey guys! Here is another chapter! I hope that you like it. I want to thank the reviewers: **whistlesinthedark** and **Megan**. Thank you guys for reviewing. I really appreciate it an di hope that you guys will keep on reviewing.

If I can't have you chapter 10

I sat in the kitchen with Cassie watching Nate attempt to cook breakfast. Today was the day. Today was the day that we would get our stuff and put it on the tour bus. It was going to be: Becky, Shane, Melissa, Jason, Nate, Cassie and I. Melissa and Jason's children were going to be staying behind with Mr. and Mrs. Grey.

I smiled at Cassie and Nate, and then it happened. I threw my hand over my mouth, hopped off of the chair and ran to the bathroom. Ahh the dreaded morning sickness. What a great part of pregnancy. I got back and saw Nate sitting on the chair with Cassie on his lap.

"Daddy? Why is mommy getting sick? Are there yucky bugs in her tummy that are making her sick?" Nate laughed and kissed Cassie's forehead.

"No sweetie, there are no yucky bugs in mommy's tummy." Cassie looked at Nate confused and I giggled.

"Sweetie. That is mommy's baby. Baby is letting mommy know that he or she is in her tummy." Cassie smiled and nodded. Her blonde curly hair was bouncing up and down and she was nodding.

"Sweetie, you have to go and get ready. Today is the day that we get to go on that big bus, and travel." Cassie cheered and hopped off of Nate's lap. She ran up the stair and did who knows what. Nate stood up and walked over to me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my forehead. I looked up at him and kissed his lips. Nate smiled and then returned the favour by kissing me this time. I loved Nate. And I always would.

____________Jason and Melissa________

Jason sat on his bed watching Melissa pack and re-pack her things. He didn't know why she was packing so many things. She already had two suitcases full of clothes. So why did she need more? Jason was wondering the same thing, so him being brave decided to ask.

"Meli, why are you packing so many things?" Melissa turned around to look at Jason and smiled.

"Jase, those two suitcases are just clothes. I still need to pack shoes, make-up, hair products, hair accessories, accessories in general." Jason's eyes widened and he stared at Melissa.

"Melissa, we are going on tour. It's not going to be a fashion show." Melissa rolled her eyes and sighed. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Jason, I want to look good. I don't want to be seen in jeans and a hoodie or a tee-shirt all the time." Jason looked at Melissa confused.

"What's wrong with that? Niki and Becky wear that stuff all the time." Melissa rolled her eye and sighed.

"Jason, Niki's style is frumpy and guy-ish. Besides she wears hoodies all the time because she gets knocked up." Jason's eyes widened and she stared at Melissa in shock. Jason couldn't believe that Melissa had actually said that.

"Mel! I can't believe that you would say something so mean!" Melissa shrugged her shoulders innocently and sighed.

"Jason, she got knocked up when she was 17. Now she is pregnant again? She can barely take care of CassieBella, and now she wants to take care of another kid?" Jason looked at Melissa and sighed. He rubbed his temples slowly trying to think of a way to get through to his stubborn wife.

"Melissa, Niki and Nate are happy. They are happy that everything happened like it did." Melissa rolled her eyes and scoffed. Jason instantly dropped that subject and moved onto the next.

"Meli?" Melissa turned around and looked at Jason. Jason smiled at Melissa and she smiled back.

"Meli, why aren't the kids coming with us, on tour?" Melissa looked at Jason, smiled again and then came to sit beside him. She looked at him and leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"Jase. I told you before. I don't want them around her." Jason backed away from Melissa a little and then looked at her oddly.

"I don't want our children around CassieBella. She will be a bad influence on them." Jason looked at Melissa and stood up.

"Melissa! Are you insane? That's the stupidest reason I have ever heard! Cassie will be a good influence on them! And besides you can't keep our children away from Niki forever!" Melissa rolled her eyes and turned around. She walked away from Jason and towards the closet. She started pulling out some shoes and started packing them into a bag. Jason sighed and Melissa just continued ignoring Jason.

"Melissa, we have to talk about this." Melissa shook her head and Jason sighed again.

"Melissa, I really think that it's time for you to grow up." Melissa stiffened, turned around and glared at Jason.

"What, the hell Jason?? Why would you say that! I am old enough!" Jason scoffed and stood up. He faced Melissa, and Melissa faced her.

"Melissa, you should forgive Niki. Becky did, and now they are closer than ever. She did nothing wrong. And if she did, she has been forgiven. So why are you being such an immature brat?" Melissa crossed her arms over her chest and sent death glares towards Jason.

"Jason! I am your wife! You shouldn't call me an immature brat!" Jason sighed almost regrettably and then spoke.

"Melissa, you changed. The person that I married would never turn her back on her sister. Especially since you hurt her when we were still in Hamilton. I don't see that person anymore Melissa. And I miss her." Melissa glared at Jason and walked out slamming the door behind her.

__________Becky___________

Becky sat on her bed finishing packing. She finished packing her clothes, and her shoes. She packed her make up, her brush and her hair products.

Becky then sat on her bed in silence. She looked around her room, and then down at her lap. She brought a hand to her stomach and started rubbing her stomach in deep thought.

"Baby, if you're a girl, I think I'll call you Bridgette. I like that name." Becky then kissed her hand and touched her tummy. She smiled and felt some tears come to her eyes. She knew that they were happy tears.

"But baby, if you're a boy, I'll call you Zachary. I've always loved that name. But baby no matter if you're a boy or a girl, I'll love you no matter what." Becky smiled and rubbed her tummy some more.

"I like the name Bridgette and the name Zachary." Becky jumped and turned around to see Shane leaning on the door frame. Becky looked at him and glared.

"Shane! You scared the crap out of you and our child!" Shane smiled a goofy grin and Becky snorted. She picked up her pillow and chucked it at his head. Shane picked it up and gently put it on the bed, while laughing.

"I'm sorry baby. I'm sorry love." Becky smiled and Shane plopped down beside her and kissed her lips lightly. Becky smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. Shane wrapped his arms around Becky and held her close.

"Shane, do you think we're ready to have children?" Shane looked at Becky and nodded.

"Becky now is the perfect time to have children. I love you completely and I don't think I could ever be more ready now." Becky smiled and leaned up and kissed Shane. Shane pulled her closer and they kissed deeply. Shane pulled away and kissed Becky's forehead.

"I want a girl." Becky looked at Shane oddly, and Shane chuckled.

"I want a baby girl. I want a baby girl so that she can be my little princess." Becky smiled and leaned against Shane, her eyes closed slowly and then she fell into a dreamless sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

hey guys! So here is another chapter. i want to apologize for the shortness of the chapter though. But I want to thank the reviewers: **whistlesinthedark**, and **Megan**. I hope that you guys like this chapter. I will make the next chapter longer I promise.

If I can't have you chapter 11

I was sitting in the bus with Shane and Becky. Nate and Jason were off talking about something that Melissa had said or done. i didn't want to know, and even if I did want to know, Nate wouldn't let me know. he wanted me to have as little stress as I could. and he thought that that would be stress. I didn't think so but whatever. Nate was just trying to help me and protect me. I sighed and watched as Cassie ran and jumped on Shane. he caught and would start tickling her. Becky watched happily and then she got up and went to the fridge. She has been having cravings more and more. I have too, but hers were just odd. right now she had a craving for tacos and peanut butter and hot sauce. I didn't like the smell of that, but Becky thought that it was awesome. she grabbed her 'food' and ate it slowly. Shane turned his head in disgust a the food that she was eating. Cassie, looked at her and smiled.

"AUNTIE! AUNTIE! ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE A BABY TOO??" Becky nodded and Cassie smiled widely.

"Yay! You and Mommy are going to have babies! that means that i can play with other kids." Speaking of kids, i wondered why Melissa and Jason's children weren't coming on tour. I was really curios and I wanted to know. i guess that I'd have to ask Nate later. I felt some sharp pains and sat up abruptly. I saw Becky and Shane looking at me with concern. I was only 6 1/2 months, so it was too early for the baby to come. I saw Cassie, sit beside me with tears in her eyes. i felt sick. I pressed my hand to my forehead and felt that it was burning up. I saw Cassie move closer.

"Mommy? Mommy? What's wrong?" I didn't say anything. I closed my eyes and Becky touched my arm and shook me lightly. Shane called Nate and Jason and they cam running out. grounded my teeth as I felt sharp pains more often.

"Niki? Niki? sweetie what's wrong?" I didn't answer him at first. i just grounded my teeth more and then I finally answered him.

"Nate! Nate, my stomach it hurts so much!" Nate's eyes widened and he sat down beside me.

"Niki? is it the baby? is the baby coming?" i shook my head and Shane had enough. He took his cell phone and called 911. Luckily for us, we weren't on the road. we were in a city. I opened my eyes and took deep breaths. I felt some more sharp pains and then closed my eyes and tried not to scream.

Half an hour later, the ambulance came. Cassie was crying and screaming the entire time. if anyone tried picking her up or taking her to the back, she would scream. she would only let Nate and Shane hold her. I got put on the stretcher and they put an oxygen mask on me. I felt them stick a needle in my arm and I winced. They put some pain killers in a needle and stuck that in. Then I slowly closed my eyes and started drifting off to sleep.

_______Later___________

I woke up in a bright white room. I looked around and noticed that i was in the hospital. i touched my stomach to make sure that I still had my babies in me. I still had the pregnant belly, but that didn't mean that the child was still in there. I rubbed around for a bit and was almost hopeless when I didn't feel any kicking. then I felt a tiny little hand or foot either punch me or kick me. i smiled widely and then sighed in relief. My baby was okay. He or She was okay. I slowly sat up and then wondered what had happened to me. i knew that I had went through the pain. But I didn't know what caused it.

I waited for a doctor to come in. i wanted a doctor to come in. I wanted to know what was wrong with me. I wanted Nate to be here. I wanted to know where he was. i wanted to know why I had those pains. i wanted chocolate.

Figures. Even when I'm in the hospital, my baby wants more food. i fed me and my baby enough food, and now it wanted more? I scoffed to myself and wondered if I would get into trouble if I pressed the red button(the one that let's nursed know that you need something) or not. i probably would. but this is an emergency! My baby is hungry! I slowly reached over to press it, when Nate and Cassie walked in. I smiled and kissed Cassie's cheek and then stared up at Nate.

"Hey sweetie." He smiled and leaned down to kiss my lips lightly. Cassie frowned and looked away when me and Nate did that. I saw that Nate had a bag in his hand, i looked up at him and he smiled.

"I thought that you might be having cravings so I brought some things." I looked at him and smiled brightly.

"Nate! i was just thinking about how Baby wants more food. He or She is saying 'Mommy! i want more food! I'm hungry!'" Nate laughed and sat down on the edge of the bed. he dumped the contents on the bed and I smiled even more. Nate had brought me and baby Reese's Pieces, smarties, skittles, star bursts and caramilk bars.

"I didn't know what you would want. so I just bought you a whole bunch of different stuff." I smiled at Nate and thanked him. I grabbed the skittles and the smarties and opened the packages. I opened them both and started eating them together. Nate looked at me strangely and then shook his head.

"Nate! I'm having cravings!I can't control what our baby wants!" Nate nodded and then smiled at Cassie. Cassie was playing with one of her baby dolls. She was holding it like a baby and feeding it her bottle.

"mommy! Mommy! See! I have a baby like you and Daddy made!" I almost choked when i heard her say that.

"Cassie, sweetie, what did you just say?" She turned to me and looked at me with her innocent eyes and repeated herself.

"Mommy, i said I have a baby like you and Daddy made." I looked at Nate and he had the same expression as I did. i couldn't believe that she had said that.

"Cassie, sweetie, where did you hear that from?" She looked at me and smiled ever so innocently.

"Uncle Shane and Uncle Jason were talking about it."


	12. Chapter 12

hey guys! Here is another chapter! I hope that you guys like the chapter! I want to thank the reviwer: **tiffboocullen**. I really hope that you like this chapter. and don't worry. Niki doesn't die, and she won't die when she gives birth to the baby.

If I can't have chapter 12: I don't wnat this baby to love me

I sat in the hospital room waiting for the doctor to come in. Nate went down to the cafe to get Cassie something to eat. I sighed and grabbed the TV and pulled it close. I really needed to do something. I was bored out of my mind. i turned on the TV and started watching cartoons. I got bored of cartoons and swtiched the channel to MuchMusic. I started singing along to a Lady GaGa song that was playing. Then the music video ended and some kind of news thing started playing. I started watching it, but wished that i hadn't.

I watched the news in horror to see that they were talking about Connect Three and our families. They started talking about Shane and Becky's. They were saying that Becky got pregnant from someone that wasn't Shane. they said that Becky was going to leave Shane and run off with the real guy that got her pregnant. I glared at the TV and grabbed my pillow. i threw it at the TV and scowled. I was about to turn it off, when they started talking about Melissa and Jason.

"We have heard recent news that Melissa and Jason's children are not going on tour this time. People have been wondering why all this time. But we finally have the right answer. the real reason why her kids aren't going on tour. Niki, and Cassie. Melissa has a problem with Cassie and Niki because Niki ran away when she was pregnant with Cassie." I stared at the TV in shock. That's the reason why they weren't going on tour? that's the reason why Melissa wanted nothing to do with Cassie!?? I glared at the TV, and was about to throw a bottle at it, when i realised that I was the last person that they were going to talk about. I payed close attention as they got started.

"And lastly, we have Niki." I braced myself and leaned in closer.

"Niki, got pregnant when she was 17 and ran away. Then a couple of years later, she got pregnant again. You think that maybe she would learn how to care of a child but I guess not. Niki is now in the hospital, and there is no news whether her baby is okay or not. I really think that Niki needs to grow up and learnt to actually take care of her children. I mean one of her children could be dead! And Nate is taking care of the other one. News flash Niki! Nate is a rockstar! He can't be doing your job and his at the same time!" I stared at the TV. I let out some tears fall. I took in a deep breath to stop myself from sobbing. I can't believe it! they were right! I am a horrible mother! I reached over and grabbed the pillow that was lying on the floor. I grabbed and held it up to my face, and I sobbed. I let out any frustration that I had. I sobbed until it hurt to cry. I felt my throat tighten. I didn't hear the door open. I didn't hear Nate and Cassie come in. I felt the pillow get ripped away and saw Cassie sitting on the bed, I saw Nate looking at me concerned.

"Mommy? What's wrong?" I ignored her and looked out the window. I thought about everything they said. I thought about how Cassie would never get love from Melissa because of me. I saw Nate, sit beside me and rub my back. I thought about how everyone was going to look down on Nate because of me. I felt Cassie tug my arm and I felt my throat close up again.

"MOMMY? MOMMY ANSWER ME!!" I looked out the window and tried to control my crying. Again Cassie pulled on my arm.

"Mommy! MOMMY! MOMMY!" I turned to look at Cassie and I snapped.

"Cassie! Can you please just shut up for 5 minutes please?!?" I heard Cassie whimper and then started bawling. I saw Nate glared at me and pick up Cassie. He held her in his arms and glared at me.

"She is just a child Niki! Don't take your anger out on her!" I looked at Cassie and she looked at me and then buried her head in Nate's neck. I felt tears erupt in my eyes and I started crying. I went to reach out to Cassie, but Nate moved backwards. I looked at Nate and Cassie and Nate just shook his head and scoffed.

"Niki, I'm taking Cassie home. I'll come back later, when you're going to get released." I looked at Nate and more tears came.

"Nate! Please don't take Cassie home! I didn't mean to yell at her!" Nate glared at me and then turned around and walked out. I looked down at my stomach and rubbed it gently. I thought for a minute, and then shook my head. I heard a knock at the door, and the doctor came in. I quickly wiped the tears away and forced a smile. The doctor smiled and came to stand by the bed.

"Alright Niki. Now it's time for the news." I nodded and the doctor looked at her clipboard one more time.

"Alright, so, what happened is that one of your babies kicked you hard in the stomach and it caused some bleeding. That's where the pain came from." I looked at the doctor when she said one of my babies. I had more that one baby.

"So, we managed to save one baby, but Niki, I'm very regretful to say that we couldn't save your little girl." I looked at the doctor, with tear filled eyes.

"You were going to have a little girl and a little boy. I am so sorry Niki, we don't know why the little survived and the little boy didn't. But the little boy did. It looks like you have a little fighter on your hands." I looked at the doctor and forced a smile. The doctor nodded and got up and left. I felt my throat close again, and I let out a sob, but this time, i wasn't holding anything back. I started sobbing uncontrollably. I rubbed my stomach and felt a kick.

"I'm sorry baby! I'm sorry that you had to lose your baby sister. I'm sorry that I won't be the perfect mother." I kissed my fingers and rubbed them on my stomach. I closed my eyes and heard the echoes of what the reporter said. I heard that in my head over and over again. I kept my eyes closed and felt more tears run down my face. I took a deep breath and then looked out the window.

"I'm a child murderer baby. I murdered your little sister." I touched my stomach and then choked on some tears.

"B-baby. When you get born, when you grow up, I want you to hate me. I want you to hate me, and give me the revenge that I need and deserve."


	13. Chapter 13

hey guys! here is another chapter. I hope you all like it. the rest of the chapter updates should be up tomorrow, if not then on Tuesday. I want to thank tiffboocullen. the review was awesome. and Niki will be apologising soon. but there is something that is going to happen to Nate.

If I can't have you chapter 13

I stared out the window of the hospital room. The doctor wanted me to stay there for a couple more days to make sure that everything was okay. I was torn in two. On the one hand, I was glad that i was still stuck in the hospital because I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to go home because of what happened. On the other hand, i wanted to go home because i wanted to apologise to Cassie and Nate. I wanted to tell them what happened to our babies, and how only one survived. I sighed and looked towards the door. Nate and Cassie haven't been back, and frankly I understand why they wouldn't be back. I had no right to yell at Cassie. She did nothing! She was just a child, and yet, I yelled at her.

I turned my gaze back towards the window and sighed. I rubbed my tummy, and felt Baby kick. I didn't know what i was going to name him yet. I wanted Nate's input because it was his son too. and I knew that he would be excited picking the name, because he didn't get to help pick Cassie's. I sighed and then looked down at my bulging belly. I smiled and kissed my fingers and put them on my tummy.

"I love you baby. I didn't mean to kill your sister. I didn't mean for her to die. I love you. Nate loves you and I know that Cassie will love you." I smiled and let a tear run down my face. I hear someone cough. I turned and almost had a heart attack when I saw Melissa standing there awkwardly.

"Hey baby sis." I forced a smile and Melissa walked closer.

"Look Niki, I'm really sorry for being such a..." I interrupted her before she could say it.

"There are little ears in the room you know!" Melissa looked at me oddly and I pointed to my tummy. Melissa smiled and apologised.

"I'm sorry Niki. I really am. I didn't mean to push you out of my life." I rolled my eyes and felt the pregnancy hormones take control.

"Well you did a fantastic job of that." Melissa nodded and looked down at her feet.

"I was so mad that you ran away. I was mad that Nate's parents said that. I was mad at you for not communicating. I was...I was just mad." I nodded and tried to stop tears from flowing.

"Meli...listen...I'm sorry for running away. But what else was I supposed to do? My husband had turned his back on me, a pregnant 17 year old." Melissa nodded and then she started crying.

"I am sooooo sorry Niki! Please forgive me??" I nodded and she ran over and hugged me. I smiled and then started letting some tears flow. She pulled away and pulled up a chair. I sighed and wiped away some tears.

"So what's been happening with you? Where's Nate and Cassie?" I looked at Melissa and then started crying.

"Oh Meli! I'm a horrible parent! I should've never had children!" Melissa looked at me and the ran up and engulfed me in a hug.

"No, Niki! You're not! You're a great parent!" I pushed her away and stared at her.

"You have no idea what I've done!" Melissa stared at me and then shook her head.

"Meli, I told my daughter to shut up!" Melissa stared at me and I sighed.

"I was in the hospital and crying because of something that a reporter said about me. and Cassie asked me what was wrong over and over again. I got frustrated and told her to shut up. She went into hysterics. Nate picked her up, yelled at me and stormed out." Melissa hugged me again as I was crying, she rubbed my back in a comforting bis sister way.

"Niki, you were stressed. I saw what the reporter said too. Nate shouldn't have just left like that. He should've waited for an explanation." I started crying harder and Melissa sighed.

"Aww sweetie. Nate and Cassie will forgive you." I shook my head and started bawling.

"Meli...I-I k-killed my child." Melissa broke away and started at me in a confused way.

"N-Niki? what?" I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.

"I don't know how it happened, but I had internal bleeding in my tummy, and my little girl died. I was going to have a little girl and a little boy, and the little girl died." Melissa hugged me closer, as I was sobbing. She started crying too, and then pulled away to look at me.

"Niki, this isn't your fault. Things like this happen, and no one can control it. But no matter what happens, or what anyone says, this is not your fault. You did nothing wrong." I stared at her, with tears streaming down my face. My face was all red and puffy. I nodded slowly, and Melissa hugged me tighter.

_______Cassie and Nate_________

Nate sat on the couch with Cassie sitting beside him. He was watching Horton Hears A who with her. Cassie was laughing and smiling and having fun, while Nate was miserable. Cassie hadn't forgotten what I had said. And whenever someone asked about me, Cassie would tell them that I told her to shut up. They would get a very irritated look on their face, and then tell Nate to make sure that Cassie wasn't around me. Nate didn't agree. He didn't disagree. He just stared at them when they said that.

Nate hadn't been back to the hospital since then. He felt guilty for not going but at the same time, he didn't. he sighed and turned his attention back to the movie. Cassie would turn to look at Nate and pull his hand and point to something in the movie. Nate would smile and kiss Cassie's forehead. He was about to go and make Cassie lunch when the phone rang. Nate sighed, got up and picked it up.

"Nate?" Nate frowned and almost stared glaring at the floor.

"Yes?" he heard a sigh and someone take a deep breath on the other end. He saw Cassie turn around and look confused. Nate smiled reassuringly and Cassie turned back to watch the movie.

"Look, I don't want to talk to you." Nate heard someone sigh, and then he heard the person stuttering.

"D-do you k-know who i-it is?" Nate glared at the floor and rolled his eyes.

"Yes. actually I do. and I really don't want to talk to you right now." Nate heard the girl sigh, and he rolled his eyes again.

"Nate, listen...I..." Nate groaned and interrupted her.

"Is there a point?" He heard the girl gasp, and he knew that she was taken back by his attitude.

"Y-yes there is a point." Nate smiled at Cassie when she turned around again. Nate couldn't help but notice how she had his curly hair, but my blond hair. Cassie had my eyes and smile. But she had Nate's face shape, his ears, and nose.

"Nate? Are you still there?" Nate turned around and walked towards the back of the house. He was afraid that there would be yelling, and he didn't want Cassie to hear.

"Yes! I'm still here!!" The girl again gasped and Nate groaned. He really wished that she would stop that.

"What is the point?" The girl was silent again, and then asked a stupid question.

"The point to what?" Nate sighed. if only she was in this room, then he could smash her head against the wall.

"What is so important that you have to tell me Caitlyn Geller?" Nate heard her sigh, and then finally answer.

"I'm still in love with you."


	14. Chapter 14

Hye guys! So here is another chapter. i hope you like it. And Caitlyn is in this chapter. I'm sorry to everyone that likes Caitlyn. I like her too actually. But she's evil in this story. I want to thank: **tiffboocullen** and **Uni(corn)** who can't sign up right now. Thanks for the reviews guy. You rock! Remember to please review.

Disclaimer: I don't own Jason, Nate or Shane. I do own Niki, Melissa, Becky and Krissie. I also own all of the kids.

If I Can't Have You chapter 14: She's evil and convincing

I got to go home today. I was so excited! Well not really. I didn't get to apologise properly to Cassie. And Nate and I had a long conversation which resulted in me crying and slamming the phone down on the receiver. I won't go into details. let's just say that Nate said some things that weren't very nice, and I said some things that weren't very nice.

But we ended up apologizing to each other. But I still had to apologise correctly, to Cassie.

I groaned and got off of the hospital bed and swayed a little. I steadied myself and then started to go to the bathroom. I was just about to go into the bathroom, when I heard a knock on the door. I sighed and opened the door. I stood back when I saw my nurse Krissie walk in. I smiled and then waved a little.

"Hello, Love." I smiled at her strong British/English accent.

"Hey Krissie." Krissie smiled and grabbed her clipboard. She looked back up at me and smiled slightly.

"Today's your last day to stay in the hospital." I nodded and walked over to the bed. I sat down and rubbed my tummy a little. Krissie walked over and stood in front of me.

"I'm miss gonna miss you. I mean who else am I supposed to gossip with?" I laughed and then agreed. Krissie looked at her clipboard again and then smiled back at me.

"Are you ready to have another ultrasound? You get to see your baby boy!" I nodded and then looked down at my lap/stomach.

"I wish that Nate and Cassie could be here to see baby." Krissie nodded and then pulled up a chair and sat down.

"You wanna tell me about what happened love?" I nodded and Krissie sat up attentively. I took a deep breath. I had a lot to tell, and only so much time to tell it in.

"I already told you about what I said to Cassie right?" Krissie nodded and I sighed.

"You told me that and you said that you apologised but that you needed to apologise in person." I nodded and Krissie told me to keep telling the story.

"Well, Nate called me and I was a little nervous to talk to him." Krissie nodded and I continued.

"So he wanted to know when I was going to be out of the hospital. I told him that I didn't know and he said that he wanted me to find out because he had to do some things with Shane and Jason and he needed someone to take care of Cassie. I asked him why he couldn't take her and he said that he didn't think that he would like that." Krissie looked confused for a second and then shook her head.

"So I asked him if he was going to a meeting. He said that he was going to a meeting and then he was going to meet an old friend of his." Krissie nodded and I sighed.

"Then he said that he wanted me to get out of the hospital so that I could take care of Cassie. I asked him why couldn't he just take Cassie with him and he said that Cassie would find it boring." Krissie nodded and then mumbled something along the lines of 'that makes logical sense. Typical boys! never think straight a day in their life'.

"And then he got really frustrated and said: You know Niki! I am really stressed okay! it's not easy being a rockstar! I need to some rockstar stuff! And Cassie can't be there for that! You have no idea how stressed out I am' and then I said: 'Nate! how do you think I feel! i am carrying your child and one died because of something that I did! Do you honestly think that I'm not stressed too!." Krissie looked at me with sympathy.

"Oh love, that's just not right. it's not your fault that your child died! Nate should understand how you feel too!" I nodded and let some tears fall. Krissie frowned and gave me some tissues.

"And then we started arguing! And he started yelling at me! And I started yelling at him! And now..." I wiped away more tears and then sniffled.

"Niki! I am so sorry! It's not that Nate doesn't love you, because he does. he's stressed and your stressed. and it's just a big mess. But it will all work out." I forced a hopeful smiled and looked down again. Krissie stood up smiling and grabbed my hand. she pulled me up in my feet and smiled even more.

"No time for frownies Love. it's time to see your baby boy!" I smiled and Krissie walked out, with me in tow. it was time to see my baby boy!

__________Shane and Becky___________

Shane and Becky were cuddling on the couch looking at a magazine. Becky had went for her first ultrasound and found out that she was having identical twins. The Doctors could already tell if they were identical or fraternal twins or not. And they were identical. But Becky and Shane didn't want to know the sex of the babies. So they were planning a nursery room. Actually they had to paint it and buy a crib. The rest was just basic things that they would need to buy after that.

"Shane, i think we should paint the room a nice, light yellow, or a nice light green. And we can have duckie's as a wallpaper. Oh..And we can have a nice, little toy chest, and a changing station!" Shane laughed and kissed Becky's cheek. Shane was excited to be a Daddy. It didn't really matter to Shane whether his and Becky's babies were boys or girls. Although secretly Shane wanted two baby girls. If Shane and Becky did have baby girls, then they would be Shane's little princesses. Shane's little angels. And they would most definitely be daddy's little girls.

Becky reached over and pinched Shane's arm lightly. He jumped and looked at Becky. Becky smiled lightly and Shane shook his head and kissed Becky's lips lightly.

"Becky, i think that, that sounds amazing! I want to do whatever I can do for our kids." Becky beamed up at Shane and rested her head on Shane's chest. Shane looked down at Becky and felt his heart flip.

"Becky, I know that I haven't told you this before, and I really should've." Becky looked up at Shane, waiting for him to keep talking.

"Becky, you have the pregnancy glow. and it makes you look just that much more gorgeous." Becky smiled widely and hugged Shane. she leaned up and kissed his lips lightly.

___________Meanwhile___________

Nate and I were in the car driving from the hospital to our house. Nate wasn't really talking to me and I wasn't really sure what to say so I wasn't talking to him. I loved Nate, but our relationship just felt so strained. I didn't know what to do. I sighed and looked out the window. I was holding the picture of our baby boy. I didn't have a name picked out yet, and I knew that Nate was going to want to help pick out a name. But we haven't talked about it yet. I sighed and stared at the stereo. i quickly turned it on and turned it up. I really didn't like the silence. I looked out the window again and then noticed that the stereo was turned down. I looked at Nate and saw that Nate was turning it down more.

"Niki, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have freaked out like that. And I shouldn't have thought that I was the only one under stress. You are under stress too. And I should've been there at the hospital with you." I shook my head and Nate grabbed my hand and kissed it.

"Cassie's still mad at me." Nate shook his head and I looked at him in confusion. Nate smiled and kissed my hand again.

"I explained to her that her baby sister went to heaven, and that's why you were so sad. She forgave you instantly. She's excited for her baby brother though." I smiled and let a tear roll down my cheek. Nate wiped it away,and when we got to a red light, he kissed my cheek.

A couple minutes later, we got to our house. Nate got out and ran over to my side of the car. He opened the door and grabbed my hand. I accepted it, and he intertwined our fingers. He smiled and kissed my hand. he walked up to the steps and opened the door. he let me go in first and then he came in. he closed the door behind me and then kissed my cheek. I was about to kiss his lips, when someone bounded down the stairs.

She was a little short but not that short. She had curly brown hair, and brown eyes. She smiled at Nate and then looked at me. her smile faded and replaced by a frown. I looked at her oddly and then turned around to look at Nate. Nate looked at the girl oddly and then wrapped his arms around my shoulder.

"Nate, who's she?" The strange girl pointed to me, and all I wanted to do was rip out her hair. I put my hand on my tummy and my baby kicked my tummy. I bet that our baby was agreeing with me, that I should pull out her hair.

"This is my wife, and the mother of Cassie and our soon to be born son." The girl looked at me and clenched her jaw. I looked at her and then at Nate. The girl looked at Nate and walked closer. she stuck out her hand and I slowly, took her hand.

"I'm Caitlyn. And you are?" I looked at her and then felt Nate tense up. This was going to be awkward.

"I'm Niki. Nate's wife." She looked at me almost in disgust. I forced a smile and Nate kissed my cheek and then my neck.

"I love you. Caitlyn probably think that I'm only showing affection for you because I'm trying to make her jealous. but I'm not. I love you with my whole heart." i turned a little to face Nate and smiled.

"How do you know that?" Nate smiled and looked at Caitlyn. she had a peeved look on her face. That almost made me wanna laugh in her face.

"The look on her face shows it all." I nodded and smiled. Hahaha! take that Caitlyn! He loves me and not you! I smiled once more and then heard footsteps. The next thing I know, Cassie is running down the steps. At first I thought that she was going to run to me, but instead, she ran and jumped into Caitlyn's arms.

"Mommy!!" I stared in shock. Cassie had called Caitlyn mommy! i turned around to see Nate have the same look on his face. we were both shocked. I stared at Caitlyn and she shot me a cocky grin.

"Cassie, sweetie, Caitlyn isn't your mommy. Niki is." Cassie turned around in Caitlyn's arms and shook her head.

"Mommy told me that she.." Cassie pointed to me and I had a sick feeling in my stomach.

"isn't a good mommy because really mommies don't tell their children to shut up. So my new mommy is Caitlyn. Cause Caitlyn says that she can take care of me better." i felt the sick feeling coming on stronger. I covered my mouth and ran to the kitchen. i stood over the garbage, and got rid of the sick feeling.


	15. Chapter 15

Hey guys! So here is another chapter. I hope that you like it. And sadly this story will only go up to about 2 or 21 chapters, and then the series will end. I hope that you guys review.

If I Can't Have You Chapter 15: Was it all a dream?

I stared at her in shock. i turned to look at Nate and found that he was smiling. I stared at him in confusion. Caitlyn smiled and then put Cassie on the ground. I looked at them and Caitlyn suddenly pulled Nate into a rough kiss. I was expecting Nate to push away. But instead he wrapped his arms around Caitlyn's waist and pushed her p against a wall. I felt my heart break and I let out some sobs and felt wet, hot tears stream down my face, Soon they broke away from each other, and both were smirking at me. I looked at Nate heartbroken.

"Nate! How could you? I thought that you loved me!" Nate smirked and pulled Caitlin closer.

"Niki, I do love you. But here's the thing, you're pregnant. And you can't have sex with someone that's pregnant." I stared at him and Caitlyn smirked and leaned up and kissed Nate roughly. I looked at Cassie and saw that she wasn't even paying attention.

"Nate! What happened to our wedding vows? Huh? What happened to 'I love you' and 'I'll only love you. I'll be faithful to you'! What happened to them?" Nate looked at me and smirked even more.

"Niki, Niki, Niki. You're so oblivious. How could you have not seen this coming? I want Caitlyn. Not you. I love you, but not like you think. We're happy now. We don't need you. But we do need our baby, so we'll be taking that now." I froze and closed my eyes tightly. Please make this go away! Please don't make it true! Please! I closed my eyes tightly and the images started fading away. I felt someone shake me lightly, and I heard a voice.

"Niki, get up! Niki! Time to wake up! Come one sweetie!" I opened my eyes to see Nate standing over me. I smiled weakly, moving away from him slightly. He seemed to notice and he looked at me with concern written all over his face.

"Niki, sweetie, what's wrong? Are you in any pain? Did our sweet little boy kick you again?" I looked at Nate and shook my head while crying.

"Nate, i had the most terrifying dream ever." Nate nodded and I got out of the vehicle and walked into the house. Nate followed me and set my stuff down on the floor. I turned to Nate, wanting desperately to ask him about Caitlyn.

"Nate, do you someone named Caitlyn Geller?" He nodded and I paled a bit. Nate wrapped an arm around my shoulders and sat me down on the couch.

"Niki, tell me what's wrong?" I took a deep breath and began to tell him. I told him about the terrible dream that i had. he listened through the entire thing and then smiled.

"Niki, you have nothing to worry about. Caitlyn and I are just friends. I mean yeah a couple days ago she called me and told me that she was still in love with me. But then she explained that when she said that she was still in love with me, she meant that she still loved me like a best friend. You have nothing to worry about." I smiled and nodded and rested my head on Nate's chest. He smiled and rubbed my tummy, feeling our baby kick under his touch. I looked up at him and he smiled down at me.

"Nate, we still need to pick a name." Nate nodded and kissed my nose. I rolled my eyes and leaned up and kissed his lips.

"I like the name Braydon Nickolas Paul." I smiled widely and felt the baby kick.

"Nate I love the name, and judging by the way that the baby kicked, I'm guessing that he liked that name too." Nate smiled and kissed his hand and then touched my tummy.

________Shane and Becky___________

Shane and Becky were at their parenting and pre-labour class. Shane had to be there because they were teaching new parents what to do when they went into labour. Becky and Shane were sitting on the floor, waiting for the teacher to arrive. Shane of course was touching Becky's stomach drawing circles on her tummy with his finger. This caused one of two babies to kick or punch Becky. Becky sighed and moved Shane's hand. Shane apologised and kissed Becky's head. He smiled and then kissed her cheek. He looked around and noticed that they were the youngest couple in here. Becky sighed and leaned against Shane. She was getting impatient. Shane could tell.

"When is the dang teacher going to be here?" Shane grabbed her hand and kissed it.

"You need to calm down hun." Becky glared at Shane and yanked her hand away.

"I will not calm down! I am hungry! And my babies are hungry! So don't tell me to calm down." Shane backed up a bit and nodded. Becky smiled and then turned back to the front. A couple minutes later, the teacher walked in. She introduced herself and then got started.

"Alright, so first we are going to be practising changing diapers. So we will have both the father and the mother doing this. Everyone go to a station and wait for further instruction." Becky stood up and Shane followed. They got to a station and saw that there was everything that they needed. Shane cringed and looked away.

"Becky, I just want you to know that I really don't want to have to change diapers. So I think that you should change them." Shane looked and saw most of the mothers glaring at him. Becky turned around and glared at Shane.

"Shane! You will change the diapers! I am not going to do everything so you can do some things! I have to carry these two amazing children around for nine months! What do you have to do? Not much! So you can change the freaking diapers sometimes! Is that okay with you Mr. I'm a big Rockstar?" Shane backed away slowly an nodded fearfully. Becky smiled and then turned back around. Shane looked around and saw some mothers giving Becky thumbs up. Shane straightened himself out and came to stand beside Becky. The teacher came back in with a box full of dolls. She got every one's attention and then started with the instructions.

"Alright. So I will give the dolls out according to how many children you will be having. So if you are going to be having triplets, then you will be getting three dolls." Someone groaned and Becky stifled a laugh. Then the teacher began talking some more.

"Alright, you have to change your babies diaper, clean them and then put the diaper on again. I will be coming around to check what you have and then I will grade you. Then you will with and your partner will do the same thing." Everyone nodded and the teacher began handing out dolls. Shane and Becky got theirs and they set them on the table. Becky got out some diapers and some wipes at turned to Shane.

"Alright, time to change the diapers Daddy." Shane paled and then he fainted.


	16. Chapter 16

hey guys! Sorry for the CRAZY long wait for an update! But here is another chapter! Hope ya like it!

If I Can't Have You chapter 16: Wake up Mr. Grey

**Becky and Shane**

Becky sighed as she waited for Shane to regain consciousness. She was tired, pregnant and she really didn't want to change the diapers by herself. The teacher told her to change the diaper of one of the fake babies while she was waiting. And she did that already. She got an A. Now she had to wait for Shane. She looked at Shane and sighed. Becky bent down to whisper in Shane's ear.

"Wake up Mr. Grey." Shane woke up and smiled and Becky and then slowly sat up and then stood up.

"Becks, I'm sorry. But when you said changing the diapers, that was just a shock." Becky smiled and handed the baby to Shane. Shane looked at the baby and slowly took it. He scrunched up his nose and set the baby down on the table. He grabbed some wipes and wiped the fake baby's bum. He started putting on the diaper and then he would stop every few seconds.

"Shaney, what's wrong?" Shane looked at Becky and smiled and waved the question off. He looked back towards the baby and started mumbling to himself. He put the diaper on and started beaming. He stepped back and let Becky see his work. Becky looked at how he put the diaper on and started laughing.

"Shaney! You put the diaper on wrong! There are supposed to be two leg holes not one! Silly billy!" Shane pouted and Becky took off the diaper and threw it in the garbage. She pulled out another one and gave it to Shane to put it on. Shane listened to everything that Becky said carefully, and he got it right. The teacher came and graded Shane's work, and gave him a B.

"Baby, if it weren't for you, I would've failed. I love you so much!" Becky smiled as Shane wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a kiss.

**Nate, Niki, Melissa and Jason**

Melissa was staring at the paint for a half an hour. Nate and Jason were getting very impatient. They were saying that it shouldn't take this long. Niki was standing beside Melissa staring at the blue paint. Nate would sigh and beg for Niki to hurry up and make her choice. It didn't work.

"Sweetie, just pick a colour. It doesn't really matter does it?" Niki turned around and glared at Nate. She crossed her arms over her chest and started tapping her foot on the ground. Nate sat up straight and then looked away, knowing that he said the wrong thing.

"Nathaniel Grey! Of course it matters! Every little detail matters! We will stay here until I pick the right colour! And you are going to accept it and like it!" Nate nodded and shut his mouth. Jason started laughing from beside him, not noticing Melissa's glare.

"Something funny Jason?" Jason stopped laughing and smiled sheepishly.

"No Meli. Nothings funny." Melissa smiled and turned around looking at the paint again. She tilted her head to one side and then to the other side.

"Meli? I think that we should paint the walls blue AND green." Melissa looked at Niki and smiled brightly.

"Let's do it!" Niki smiled and grabbed the two colours that she wanted and walked up to the counter. The worker came and got the colours and went to go and mix them. Nate sighed and got up. He walked behind Niki and wrapped an arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek. He started rubbing her tummy and felt Baby kick.

"Mr. Grey. Stop it. You're making our baby kick and it isn't a pleasant feeling." Nate laughed and kissed Niki's cheek again.

"I wouldn't know how that feels." Niki turned around to glare at him. Nate shut up and looked away, trying not to laugh.

"There you go. The paint that you need Miss." Nate glared at the guy and grabbed the paint.

"She's married." The guy's eyes widened and he smiled nervously and quickly apologised. Melissa grabbed Jason's hand and drug him off into another direction.

"We won't be home for a while." Nate looked confused, and Niki rolled her eyes and very bluntly told Nate what Melissa meant.

"Melissa and Jason are going to have sex and create a baby." Nate got a really disgusted look on his face and almost dropped the paint.

"Ew! Melissa and my brother...making babies...ew!" Nate shuddered and Niki rolled her eyes and walked out the door quickly leaving Nate having to run to catch up.

Once Nate and Niki got to the car, and got in the car, Niki rubbed her tummy and looked at Nick sweetly and innocently.

"Nate? Our babies hungry. Our baby needs food." Nate looked at Niki and smiled. He kissed her cheek and then rubbed her tummy. The baby kicked against his hand and he smiled.

"And what does Baby want to eat?" Niki thought for a bit then smiled widely.

"Baby wants...Taco Bell, KFC, Wendy's, curly fries and...peanut butter!" Nate got a really disgusted look on his face and nodded. He sat there and then looked at Niki.

"Sweetie wouldn't it be better if you maybe had a salad?" Niki looked at Nate and she glared at him.

"Are you saying that I'm fat?" Nate nodded and then shook his head.

"Sweetie the only reason why I think you should have a salad is because the baby needs good food." Nick crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Nate.

"You said that I'm fat and that I need to eat a salad because I'm fat." Nate's eyes widened and he shook his head. Niki glared at him and put her hand on her tummy.

"Frankly Nathaniel, our son thinks that calling mommy fat isn't nice. And he is appalled with you!" Nate rolled his eyes and smiled. He started the car and kissed Niki's cheek.

"So off to Taco Bell then?" Niki smiled and hugged Nate tight.

"I love you Natey!"


	17. Chapter 17

Hey guys! Sorry for the wait! Here is another chapter! Please review!

If I can't Have You chapter 17: Two weeks later

**Melissa and Jason**

Melissa was sitting in the bathroom staring at herself in the mirror. She couldn't believe it. Here she was staring at a pregnancy test, waiting for Jason to come home. She was waiting patiently, and then she heard the door open. Melissa got off of the counter and took a deep breath.

"Meli? Sweetie? Are you home?" Melissa walked downstairs and looked at Jason. Jason looked at Melissa and smiled. But when he saw the serious look, his smile dropped and he became worried.

"Meli? What's wrong?" Melissa looked at Jason and grabbed his hand. He followed her, all the while having a worried expression on his face. Melissa pulled him into their bathroom and closed the door.

"Jason. I have some news." Jason nodded and waited for Melissa to tell him.

"Jason. I'm pregnant." Jason stared at Melissa for a bit and then he broke out into a smile. He picked her up and spun her around. When he set her down, he kissed her softly. Melissa giggled and kissed Jason back.

"Meli, we are going to have another baby!"

**Nate and Niki**

I was getting bigger and bigger every single day. I was getting sick of being pregnant. I really was. i just wanted this baby out. But I wasn't supposed to be due for three weeks. I really wanted the baby to come early too. But Nate told me that that was bad. But I really didn't care. I just wanted this baby out!! Oh yeah and I was having really weird cravings too. I think that Nate was getting sick of my weird cravings. But that was just too bad. I mean he didn't have to carry a baby for nine months. he shouldn't be complaining!

"Sweetie! I have your...food!" I smiled as Nate came into the living room holding my food. I grabbed it from him, after saying thank you, and opened it up. It was a salad with mandarin oranges. I smiled and then grabbed the peanut butter that was in the bag. I grabbed the spoon and dumped the peanut butter on the salad. Nate turned away and I laughed. Silly Nate.

When I was done, I put the garbage in the garbage and bit my lip. My stomach was hurting so bad. But it wasn't the baby kicking. I felt a sharp pain and I gasped. Nate looked at me and then came to my side. He knelt down beside me and kissed me cheek, trying to distract me.

"Sweetie, Niki, what's wrong?" I closed my eyes and tried not to cry. But it hurt so much! Nate grabbed my hand and I bit my lip.

"Nate, Nate. I think..." Nate looked at me with concern as I was biting my lip. I felt something happen and then I felt something wet. I groaned and bit my lip harder. My water just broke and my baby was coming three weeks early!

"Niki, sweetie what's wrong? Tell me what's wrong sweetie!" I squeezed his hand and felt sharp shooting pains.

"NATE THE BABY IS COMING!!!" Nate's eyes widened and he quickly stood up and ran to find his keys. He quickly started the car and came back for me. He helped me in the car and called Becky. He told her that the baby was coming and that she had to watch Cassie. He hung up the phone and sped to the hospital.

When we got to the hospital, Nate pulled into the parking lot and told me to stay here. He ran in and grabbed a wheelchair and ran back out. Once I was in the emergency room, nurses came to see if I was doing okay. They took me to the delivery room while Nate signed me in. Once he got there, he came to the bed that I was in and sat in the chair beside me. The nurse came in after with the doctor and they started doing things. They were checking my pulse and everything necessary.

**Becky and Shane**

Shane and I were just watching a movie, when my phone started vibrating. I rolled my eyes and picked up only to be met by a frantic Nate. After calming him down slightly, he told me that Niki was going into labour early and that I needed to watch Cassie. I said okay and hung up the phone. I stood up and ran to our room and got some clothes. I was followed by a confused Shane and I rolled my eyes. I put all my stuff in a backpack and ran out of the room. Shane followed me and kept asking me questions. I finally told him what was happening, and his eyes widened. He pulled me along to the car and pushed me in. He got into, the other side and then started speeding towards Nate and Niki's.

Once we got there, we were met by a crying Cassie. I ran in and found her lying in her parents bed, hysterical. I picked her up and she cried into my shoulder. I held her close and waited for her to stop. She looked up at me and then wiped her eyes.

"Where's mommy and daddy Auntie Becky?" I looked down at her and smiled widely.

"Cassie mommy and daddy are going to go and get your new baby!" Cassie's eyes widened and she smiled widely.

"Really? There's gonna be a baby?" I nodded and Cassie smiled and pulled out of my arms. She stood up on the bed and started jumping up and down.

"A baby! A baby! Mommy and Daddy are bringing home a baby!" I nodded and Shane walked into the room and looked at me. He motioned for me to come here. I told Cassie to go and watch some TV. So happily, she ran out of the room and into the living room. Shane walked into the room and sat down beside me.

"Becky. Nate called." I looked at Shane and then down at the floor.

"And what?" Shane looked down and then at me.

"Nate said that the baby coming three weeks early isn't all that good." I nodded and then looked at Shane.

"So what now?" Shane looked at me and then sighed.

"They are going to see once she delivers the baby. There may not be anything wrong. Or there could be a whole lot wrong. They don't know yet." I nodded and Shane wrapped an arm around my shoulders and kissed my forehead.


	18. Authors Note

Hey guys! Sorry for not updating for quite a while. Well...I have good news and bad news. First the bad news.

I am no longer going to be writing anymore stories or updating anymore. I'm just caught up in school and work and...well...I don't really have any time, so as of May 10, I am going to be deleting all of my stories.

Now for the good news.

My friend who is an author on FanFiction, is willing to 'adopt' my stories that YOU GUYS really want to be continued. Me and my friend have very similar writing styles so it shouldn't be too different.

So is you wish for the stories to be continued, please ask her very nicely which stories you want continued and she will see what she can do. Her pen name is: Miss Blonde Bee. So once again, sorry for not updating and keeping up with the stories. Here is an opportunity for them to be continued. Thanks guys.


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